Undertale - Kindness
by sakurainari
Summary: Something happens to stop the normal flow of a Genocide run. An anomaly appears...but maybe it's not the one you think.
1. Penance

Slash!

"heh, didja really think you'd be able to-"

Sla-

Sans saw the double slash - no time to dodge. "I'm dead," he thought-

When the battle haze cleared, Frisk was posed with her knife almost touching him, struggling against...something.

She backed up, eyes red but glowing with a strange yellow light that started emanating from her in blasts. Sans backed away from her, wondering...

The yellow rays exploded from her and somehow she split into three people, the largest in the center.

The normal Frisk was on Sans' right side, and a girl in a green sweater on the left.

In the middle, there was an older girl with a cape. She got up and extended a glowing blade from her right hand, looking at Sans directly. He braced to dodge and prepared for battle.

But instead, first she turned and stabbed the girl in the green sweater through and through. Sans couldn't tell if it killed the girl or not. Then she put away her weapon and turned to Frisk, grabbing her by the sweater and pulling her upright. She looked carefully into her eyes, then let her go and turned to Sans. Frisk started crying out of shock, turning away like there was nothing left in her in terms of energy.

Sans and the older girl regarded each other for a minute. He marked how she looked calm, but with no malice... not like the red-eyed Frisk he had just been fighting.

"So..." he said. "That was weird. What are you anyway?"

She looked slightly ashamed. "I'm ... a player."

"What?" he said.

"I took over control from another player to stop you from getting killed," she said. "It's a long story."

"I see," he said. "You want me to think you're not the same one who's been killing everyone?"

"I'm actually not," she said.

He was looking at...something. Suddenly she realized.

"I didn't think I'd actually have a level here," she said, surprised. "Are you reading it?" she asked.

"ROSE. LV 1000. EXP 1000000. Is happy you are alive," he was reading.

His eyesockets went dark. **"YOU'VE KILLED A LOT HAVEN'T YOU..."** he said.

She winced. "You really are amazing," she said. "I really didn't think it would show..."

 **"** _ **WHY . . ."**_ he asked. Frustration over the resets was overwhelming, and now finally this could be the answer he had been looking for all along. Why Frisk could be so different depending on the run. Why there were "save points" and "resets". She called herself a player? He was starting to get an inkling of what was really going on. Was this person the real "anomaly"? Was that why they had so much LV?

He attacked with lines of bones, and then as she dodged, with Gaster blasters. She blinked out of sight for a few seconds, and he saw Frisk and the girl in green - Chara? - disappear. Then Rose was back.

She dodged skillfully, almost as if made of air. She made no attack at him herself, only watched with sober eyes and weaponless hands.

They fought for a long time, or rather he fought and she dodged.

 **"** _ **WHY . . ."**_ he kept saying, and every time he said it, her eyes looked a little sadder. She got slower.

 **"YOU SAID YOU ARE A PLAYER...** _ **IS THIS A GAME TO YOU?!"**_ he yelled, putting everything into a massive attack.

His words made her stop, and she seemed to resign herself with getting hit with the attack, determined to take it all as a kind of penance or apology.


	2. Starlight

But no matter how hard she got hit, it didn't seem to have any effect.

His attacks came up against something hard, like a shield, stopping her from getting damaged. Even blue gravity attacks were stopped.

He paused for a second, exhausted. She had been pummeled by the force of the attacks into sitting on the floor, but was still undamaged.

She said, "Now I'm going to use your own special attack. Nothing. You can decide to stop fighting and spare me whenever you want. I won't dunk on you if you do," she said, promptly curling up in a ball on the floor and pretending to sleep.

* ROSE IS SPARING YOU

Finally, his sense of humor returned. "heh. good one, kid..."

She peeked at him through one eye.

Sans shrugged. "maybe somebody who can make a joke like that, isn't all bad. I don't know."

She wondered if it was over.

"But...I'm not going to trust you that easily. I can see you have an ability that lets you stop my attacks, but how long can you keep up that shield you have? So from now on, it just won't be your turn anymore. You might as well quit now."

"Sans..." she said. "I seriously care about you a lot, even if you don't understand why. Even if you end up hurting me, I would never wound you."

"Zzzzzz..." He was already asleep, or pretending to be.

She sighed, saying to herself under her breath, "Welp, gonna be a long wait. I wonder if I'm allowed to take bathroom breaks?"

She fell asleep herself for a few hours. On waking up, it looked closer to late afternoon. He still looked asleep.

Out of curiosity, she stood up and walked toward him. She stopped about ten feet away and looked him over closely.

"Am I being tested?" she wondered. "If I get any closer, he might think I meant harm."

She sighed again. "Aw, fuck it." She turned and went back to her previous spot on the floor, sitting down again.

Taking out a laptop from a pack she carried with her, she entertained herself with games as best she could.

At one point, she thought maybe he opened one eye just a little bit, but when she looked again, she couldn't be sure.

It turned to night, and she finally got tired enough to fall into a deep sleep. She curled up like a squirrel with her cape wrapped around her, using her pack as a pillow.

She woke to getting blasted from all sides, followed by a massive bone attack.

It bounced her all over the room, but she was still not damaged.

When he finally stopped, she was really dizzy, and it took awhile to reorient herself. He looked rather inscrutable, more frightening now that it was dark and only starlight lit the floor. Starlight, and blue fire.


	3. Sorry about this

"well, kid. That was my strongest attack. I guess you have the ability to maintain your shield while you're asleep after all, huh?"

"Basically, yeah," she said. She had an impulse to run. He looked more like a scary monster now than at any time she had ever seen him. She reminded herself, "It's Sans."

"You should just quit, you know," he said. "Just reset. This isn't going anywhere for either of us."

"Resets don't solve everything," she said. "Resetting won't stop you from getting killed again."

He thought, "now we're getting somewhere."

He said out loud. "So it's not enough for you to kill us over and over again? What more do you want from us?!" There was a world of bitterness in his words.

She looked sad. "I...didn't kill you, ever...I don't want to see you hurt again... it's like a stake through my heart when the others hurt you..." she said. "If I die or quit, the other player will return and kill you. I won't let that happen."

He thought, "Something about this one is different. She actually sounds... sincere?" He felt trapped by indecision, trapped by the world itself. His trust had been shattered too many times.

Something had been bugging him for awhile, pestering for his attention. Oh yeah. "What did you do with the other two girls?"

"I took them back to my ship," she said. "I'm actually the captain of a starship called the Altair. Both of the girls are fine, I think. My weapon only stunned Chara."

"i see...a starship, huh? That's a new one." he said.

"This really is an unusual timeline," Sans reflected inwardly. "What a crazy kid. Do any of the normal expectations apply here?"

"So, what now?" she asked.

"dunno."

"Can we stop?"

"no."

She sighed with exasperation. "Aughh. Fine. You're going to make me resort to my ultimate, final, super special attack. I really didn't want to do this, but you're not giving me much choice."

She ran towards him. He attacked, and dodged, and attacked, and dodged.

"She's too close!" He teleported away, and again and again, but she was catching up, and he could only teleport so many times before getting tired.

After one final attack, he knew she had him. What was dying going to feel like this time? At least this time he had learned something new. He tried to focus on remembering for the next run.

Her arms went around him, and she hugged him tight. "Sorry about this Sans..." she whispered.


	4. Can't blame you

The scene shifted.

They were somewhere else. She let go and backed up a few steps.

He felt disoriented. "Where...where is this?"

"My office," she replied. "On the ship."

He looked down. No damage.

"umm...well thanks for not killing me, I guess?"

She looked apologetic, but she was quiet, waiting for a reaction nervously.

He looked around. There was a computer screen nearby.

It said,

CONTINUE RESET

"What..." Reality was tilting upside down. "Is _this how?!"_

"Here we go," she thought. "What is he going to do?"

He took control.

CONTINUE RESET

"Reset!"

The game reset.

He didn't move or speak for a long moment.

She said tentatively, "Everyone...should be alive again now..."

Was that tears?

"Are you ok?" she asked softly.

His hand moved-

"Crap-!" she cried.

She got pierced from all sides with sharp bones.

Sans saw it was enough to seriously wound her. But not kill... Her guard and her shield were definitely down, but something still protected her enough to stop the bones from completely running her through.

She was on her hands and knees choking on blood.

"Sans-" she started, then stopped. "No. No. I can't really blame you for this."

He tried attacking again, but now her shield was back up, and he did no damage.

So stupid, she thought. How arrogant to think she could talk him down. What did she expect? Of course, he thought she was the one who'd been killing everyone all along - worse than the killer Frisk, worse than Chara, worse than Flowey.

She let her guard down after he reset. But for all he knew, this was his one chance of stopping her for good, and he'd taken it. Why not?

Only her inner shield had saved her. Weaker than the main shield surrounding her like a bubble, the inner shield stayed right at skin level and helped block attacks. But given a strong enough attack, the inner shield could be pierced. The inner shield had slowed down the bones but not completely stopped them.

She knew damage to the digestive system was very dangerous, and she was losing blood at a life-threatening rate. She was on the verge of fainting from the pain and the bones embedded in her torso weren't making it any easier to move.

Carefully, she used her inner shield to push out and eject the bones. Then she molded the inner shield to act as a temporary bandage over the many wounds.

Sans was having a hard time with watching this. He'd killed the human Frisk enough times to get inured to the violence, but seeing the half-dead human dying covered in blood was getting to him. Her weak efforts to help herself made it even more gruesome.

How long did it take humans to die after they took damage? His knowledge of human anatomy was pretty rough. He kept his face from showing it, but he was screaming with terror and anguish inside.

Rose clutched her stomach painfully.

"Is fighting really the only option?" she asked Sans. "You have blood on you..." The sight of it was gut-wrenching.

"I won't let you hurt them anymore," he said fiercely, with the feelings of retribution from many timelines of despair.

His blue eye flared with anger and determination.

"Do you even know what everyone has gone through? Do you think it's just me that remembers? The others might not remember as clearly, but they have nightmares too. Our souls can't take this forever."

"Cracks and lines are starting to form in our hearts. One day you might find that we've all turned to dust and no resets will bring us back again. I hate the role you've put me in, but I have no choice but to fight you. You passed the point of mercy so many timelines ago, it's not even funny."

Rose empathized with that. She wished the real genocide player could see this in person. They'd run like the coward they were. At this moment, Sans was awe-inspiring, with blue flames and Gaster Blasters at his side.

She was losing strength. She whispered faintly, "I want to help. Please. I'm sorry you've all been hurt so bad. I'm not the one who killed everyone. Look in my eyes, Sans. Do I have the eyes of a killer?"

He had to admit to himself that she didn't. Her eyes were gentle. But then, where did all her LV come from?

He had figured her to be the one controlling Frisk across multiple timelines, so that her EXP increased every time Frisk killed. The Anomaly.

The one who kept consuming timelines over and over, never satisfied.

The one who would pretend to be his friend in one timeline, and then kill him in the next.

The one who enjoyed pretending to be merciful, only to later reset and cruelly slash away at him and his friends and kill them without mercy over and over again.

But now, he questioned that theory.

Now that he could look at her closely without being in the middle of a fight, he could see that nothing about her resembled the red-eyed Frisk who had killed so many times with a gleeful smile.

There was no glee over the violence from Rose, just sadness. But after so many betrayals, it was hard for him to trust anymore. This was his first real chance to stop the Anomaly, and he had to take it.

She was getting weaker, going into shock and losing blood pressure, barely conscious.

After a few minutes, something happened. Her outer shield hardened and turned from transparent to an opaque gold, as she went into a self-induced stasis, a desperate last resort to keep herself alive. Everything became quiet.

Sans collapsed onto his knees, holding his skull with bony fingers and weeping and shivering from the stress. Not just from this fight, but from many fights before it. 

Being a kind person by nature, hurting someone else did far more mental damage to him than getting hurt himself. He refused to distance himself from the pain of having compassion, because he didn't want it to become easy to hurt others.

He'd been avoiding the thought for a long time, but the truth was he was very close to his breaking point. Every reset, every death brought him to the edge of a cliff that he feared he'd get pushed off of eventually.

Everything seemed to be pressing down on him as his eyesockets flooded with tears.

Would his efforts to stop the Anomaly here finally end this horrendous cycle? Would it stop the killings? He didn't know. He couldn't tell if they were still alive or not inside that shield. Maybe they'd just reset again. That's what happened in every fight before.

All he knew for sure was, something had to change, and soon, or he'd lose his sanity completely.


	5. Looking for clues

After a time, Sans calmed down enough to think clearly.

So...what now? Sans wondered. Would they reload? Was that possible here? He'd seen Frisk do that occasionally before, even when they hadn't died, after something happened they didn't like.

But nothing was happening so far. Maybe that meant he should try to do something.

He hit Rose's shield bubble half-heartedly with a few attacks to see if it was possible to break through.

Part of him hoped that it wasn't. He was sick and tired of bloodshed, and his growing doubts were making him more and more reluctant to fight. He felt a small twinge of relief when he found the shield was harder than diamond, harder than when Rose was awake. There was no way he was breaking through.

He turned to the computer instead. It was still open where it'd been left. From his science background, Sans was fairly familiar with computers. It confirmed what he had suspected for a long time. It really was a game. The timelines were controlled by a game. When he started it, Frisk began in the ruins.

He leaned back, massaging his skull with one hand, momentarily stunned by the revelation. Then he leaned forward again in the chair, taking control of the computer and investigating where the game was being run from. There was still another question to answer.

It seemed Rose had set up a network tunnel to another computer, and the current game on the screen was running there.

"Undertale..." he whispered. "So...if that's somebody else's game, where is her game? Is there another instance of the same program?"

Clicking out of the remote computer connection, he found her own game on the desktop. On opening it, he saw everyone was alive, together, and waiting for Frisk, right before leaving for the surface.

It was an odd moment, looking at a miniature version of himself. He really wished there was some way to talk to the other Sans, but that didn't seem possible under the game's mechanics.

"It's the good ending..." Sans murmured softly. "So, she was telling the truth after all...she was not the original player...but then why did she have so much LV? Could it be a trick?" The full truth still seemed out of reach.

There didn't seem to be any more answers to be found here.

There was apparently no way to return to his own timeline, either, by using the computer or anything else in the office. No time travel machine.

He tried opening the door to the hallway outside.


	6. what are we

If this was a ship, it didn't match anything he expected. Instead of cold, artificial walls, vines and tree branches lined everything in the corridor, as though they were part of the ship itself. Birds flitted among them, chattering away to each other with cheerful melodies.

He peaked through the slightly opened door checking for passers-by before opening the door all the way and stepping out into the corridor. Given the length of the corridor, he got the impression this was a very large ship. It hummed with a distant engine sound.

Sans tried teleporting to save time and effort, but it didn't work for some reason. He hated walking but it looked like there was no choice.

Sans took a few tentative steps into the hall, and exhaled slowly as nothing happened. He passed by a few doorways without meeting anyone.

But before long, he ran straight into a large white and gray wolf, patrolling the hallways. It gave Sans a very steely look, and sniffed towards him. Sans realized he was speckled in Rose's blood, and the wolf probably smelled it. Following the scent trail back to the office, the wolf sniffed Rose's gold pearl-like shield ball and the pool of blood underneath it, snuffling anxiously. The wolf returned from the office, lowered its head and growled, moving towards Sans.

Sans didn't have any quarrel with this wolf. He wouldn't use a damaging attack. He used a blue gravity attack, and the wolf floated with a surprised yip. They regarded each other for a few moments. Now helpless, the wolf stared at him with soulful, sad eyes.

"hey...you're giving me waves of guilt, here, pup," Sans said. The wolf whined sorrowfully, looking between him and the direction of the office, pawing at the air.

At that moment, Aldyr the first officer turned a corner and saw them both. He'd been coming to check on Rose, having been alerted by the sensors she'd returned to the ship. He was surprised to see Sans alone with Kiro, Rose's wolf companion.

On seeing a new person, Sans released the wolf. Although the dogs back home sometimes tried to chase skeletons to chew on them, he'd learned to fear humans more than canines. If this human was going to attack, he'd save his magic for them instead.

"What's going on here?" Aldyr asked.

Kiro howled, speaking long sentences in wolf. Aldyr seemed to understand.

"Ok Kiro. At least she's in stasis," he said grimly. "Go get Khermos."

Kiro sprinted down the hall, and a short time later, chief medical officer Khermos and his assistants came and retrieved Rose, bringing her out of stasis and rushing her to the med bay.

Meanwhile, Aldyr asked Sans, "Well, skeleton, what do you have to say for yourself?"

"You people have been killing my friends. I did what I had to do to stop it."

Aldyr bit his lip. "I don't remember killing your friends. Are you sure you're accusing the right people?"

It was an honest question. Sans couldn't help but respond on the same level. "A killer has been stalking and murdering my brother, my friends, and our people. They've killed over 100 of us. When I tried to stop them, and was fighting them, the killer split into three people. One of them was Rose."

"I see," Aldyr said. "We are not a bad people. We would not let even our captain get away with murdering anyone. But I suspect this is a case of mistaken identity. Will you come with me now, and we will decide on guilt or innocence later?" 

"I don't think so," Sans said. If this human was part of Rose's crew, maybe he was no different than the Anomaly. He couldn't trust him.

At the thought of the Anomaly who had been murdering his friends for so long, his fury returned, and his left eye glowed bright blue. Sensing danger, all of the small birds nearby scattered in a panic and flew away down the corridor.

"Aren't you the one she was trying to save?" Aldyr asked, alarmed. "What happened?"

He got answered with attacks of bones and Blasters. Aldyr used his shield and dodging to avoid damage, but he didn't react quite fast enough to prevent his cape being singed on the bottom edge.

Aldyr could see Sans was not in the best mental state. He looked tired, and emotionally scarred. His demeanor had layers of sadness, too. Sans had been driven to this point by things that had happened to him. He wasn't doing this because he wanted to.

"It's obvious you're furious and you've been through a lot, but please calm down. No one here is going to hurt you," Aldyr said, panting from dodging the attacks.

"why not just kill me like you did everyone else? that's what you people do right? kill them and then reset with a computer? what are we, some kind of lab experiment?" Sans said in a dead voice. He attacked again.

Aldyr dodged, and a line of bones was buried in the corridor wall behind him.

Man, that's dark, Aldyr thought. What was going on here? He rubbed one of his eyes, trying to construct a diplomatic and truthful response, while he kept the other eye open for an attack.

Aldyr looked at Sans, clear-eyed and direct.

"We'd never do something like that. Not on this ship. I'd die first," Aldyr asserted. "Give me a chance to sort this out."

It wasn't enough. Sans was still tense, magic flaring and ready to strike him down.

Aldyr was worried someone else would get badly hurt if this continued, even with his best efforts. The ship was filled with animals, and many of them didn't have personal shields like the crew. They shouldn't be fighting here in the corridor where one of the eagles might come flying along at any second.

"Please..." Aldyr said. "If you really won't stop fighting, can we take this elsewhere? My friends might get hit with your blasts otherwise. My captain and my friend is already almost dead from your attacks. How much more are you going to hurt them?"

Aldyr's concern for his friends knocked Sans out of his dark haze, reminding him of better times.

Sans checked Aldyr's stats to try to determine his LV and EXP.

"ALDYR. LV 3. EXP 48. Spends his time worrying about everyone," he read.

Sans closed his eyesockets for a moment. When he opened them again, he was out of battle mode. He was already worried he'd made a mistake in assuming the worst with Rose. He would not make the same mistake twice. Although LV 3 wasn't great, at least this human didn't have maxed out LV.

"i guess maybe you're not as bad as i thought. i think we can call it quits for now."

"That's good news. Will you come with me now, and in return I'll do my best to help you get some answers?" Aldyr asked.

"all right," Sans said.

"My name is Aldyr, by the way," Aldyr said. "I'm the first officer here."

"sans," Sans replied. "sans the skeleton."

"Pleased to meet you, Sans," Aldyr said. He led Sans towards the med bay. He had to get answers on Rose's condition before he did anything else.


	7. Shivering memories

Aldyr and Sans sat out in the waiting room as the doctors performed emergency surgery for Rose.

Sans felt himself shaking, and tried to stop it from getting to be enough to rattle his bones audibly.

He was still trying to come down from the fear and panic of another killing run, and another life and death battle.

Part of the fear was wondering if he was starting to turn into what he hated the most. He lectured Frisk so many times on violence, but how many times had he killed by now? How many times had he sent bones ripping through Frisk's body, turning it into a dead bloodied mess?

Sure, it was only after they'd literally killed everyone in their path and were about to destroy the world, but wasn't there any other way?

At least those other times, things had been over quickly. Today, watching Rose crawl for several minutes and not die had been worse than seeing a quick death - knowing how much pain it probably was for her, after dying himself several times. And she kept saying she was innocent.

Sans wondered how close he was to losing it completely. It was getting harder and harder to trust his own judgment, as with every killing run he sensed his emotions getting more and more out of control. He was tired of seeing monsters be killed, he was tired of being killed, and he was tired of killing.

It was soul-wrenching sometimes, watching Frisk come out of the ruins again, after a very bad run. The kind that gave Papyrus nightmares. Sometimes he wanted to kill them as justice for what they'd done. But despite that, he always tried hard to be kind and give them a fresh chance.

The timelines, and this Anomaly entity possessing Frisk had made questions of morality very tricky. There was no precedent in Asgore's legal or history books for how to handle it. So he'd resolved to treat each new Frisk as a different person after a reset, no matter how he felt about what they'd done in another timeline.

He didn't think he'd done the wrong thing with Frisk so far, fortunately. He'd done his best not to show his anger at how the Anomaly had used their body in previous timelines. Toriel's promise from him had helped with that. The promise was something he hung onto whenever his own hurt and pain from Frisk's past murders was getting to be too much.

Only every now and again, he'd spoken to the Anomaly directly. Sometimes, he noticed that they did act differently afterward. Sometimes, even with... regret? Sometimes he saw them try to undo what they'd done, and work hard to do better the next time. It gave him hope that the Anomaly was not a purely evil force.

He'd been studying the Anomaly's behavior closely with the help of some of the other sans-es he managed to contact, and the Anomaly was quite erratic. As though they were one person throughout a given timeline, but then could act like a completely different person in the next timeline.

Maybe that gave some support to Rose's claim that she wasn't the one controlling Frisk in the last timeline. Maybe the Anomaly was actually multiple people. It was a theory he'd considered, but didn't have any solid data for until now.

But today, when he met the shadowy Anomaly, the one he had suspected for a long time of manipulating Frisk and Chara and turning them into murderers, he felt all of the hidden anger he'd built up and suppressed for so long.

He wondered if he'd lost control for the first time today. What if Rose really wasn't responsible for all of this? He could've tried to talk to her. He could've asked her why she was doing this, and let her answer. He'd let his fury power his actions instead of calm thinking. It was his responsibility as a judge to make sure that he was being fair.

It was the LV she had that had driven his suspicions to the breaking point. Surely that meant she was the real killer. But what if it was a mistake somehow, or faked? Was that even possible? If he'd made a mistake, he hoped desperately she didn't die.

Aldyr sensed Sans's thoughtfulness, and intentionally didn't speak. He knew how annoying it could be when someone interrupted your deep thinking. He stood watching at the window to the operating room with a wistful and concerned expression.

Lira, the second officer, came and visited Aldyr, asking for status, and telling him about some friends in another world who desperately needed assistance after a disaster. He told her what had happened with Rose, and to help their friends with their disaster and then to try to return the ship to this location as soon as possible. She bowed with respect, obeyed and returned to the bridge.

Overhearing their low conversation, Sans vaguely wondered, "where are we, anyway...?", but the question didn't seem that important right now. It was something to deal with later.

Three hours later, Khermos finally came out of surgery. Aldyr had in fact returned to his seat and was lightly dozing the last hour or so. Sans was still too keyed up to relax, thoughts racing.

Aldyr stood to talk to Khermos.

"How is she?" Aldyr asked worriedly, trying to read Khermos's face for answers.

"Stable, at the moment," Khermos replied. "The damage is very bad, though. I've done what I can to repair it, but we'll see how she does overnight. The natural healing process needs to take over now."

Unnoticed by them, Sans smiled a little. " _heh - so she's alive_ ," he thought. It was a bittersweet feeling, not knowing if he'd have to fight her again if she turned out to be bad after all.

Aldyr exhaled, relieved. "How long do you think it will be before she's conscious?"

"Maybe tomorrow."

"Understandable. Sans here says she killed his people, though, and he hurt her in defense of them."

"She'd never do that," Khermos said emphatically.

"I agree, personally. Maybe it'd be best, Sans, if you told us what happened from the beginning. I'll assemble the senior officers to listen."


	8. Collapse

After a long and dreary meeting, the ship's senior leadership decided to wait for Rose to wake up before doing anything else, keeping everything in a holding pattern until then.

"This is my cabin," Aldyr showed Sans. "We'll be staying together until this matter is resolved. I'll ask you to stick close to me for now and not wander the ship. Rose will have a similar restriction. I want to think the best of both of you, but under the circumstances, being that we're in the middle of an investigation, that's my responsibility as the acting captain."

"i get it," Sans said. He noticed Kiro was following closely behind him as well, the wolf watching him with sharp eyes.

They'd made him his own guest bed anyway, across the room from Aldyr's, so there was that. Sleep was kind of attractive right now. Sleep? Yeah, sure, if he _could_ sleep.

Sans felt numb, his emotions diving down into apathy and depression again. He was completely and totally drained. But the numb feeling was only a thin layer over other feelings.

For some reason, all of the deaths from Frisk's latest rampant slaughter were coming crashing down on him right now. Discordant, loud sounds of terror and pain that only he could hear in his own mind. He tried to contain how he felt enough to not show it on the outside.

Aldyr quietly made himself dinner in the cabin's kitchen. Sans wondered what to do with himself. He made do with sitting at the table, for now.

"It's probably an impolite question, but I've never met a skeleton before," Aldyr said. "May I ask, do you...eat?"

It was tempting to make a pun out of that, but he wasn't in a very punnish mood. "yes. i do."

"Can you generally eat human food, or is it something else?"

Sans knew the answer to that since he'd actually been on the surface before, in another timeline. It was...harder...to eat human food, as opposed to monster food that had a lot of magic in it, but he could manage it.

"yes, i can," he replied tersely. He still felt somewhat mistrustful, despite Aldyr's friendliness. He had been kidnapped here, after all.

"All right, then. I'll make you some of what I'm eating tonight. Ok?"

Aldyr made some potatoes with steamed vegetables and beans with sauce, and toasted bread.

He watched Sans eat with interest, in between taking bites of dinner himself.

Sans knew by experience this was always something that humans were curious about when it came to skeletons. At least the food got him back to full HP. He'd suffered some minor bumps and scrapes in the long battle, as well as exhaustion.

"By the way," Aldyr said, "Do you have family we should inform? I don't want to think of someone waiting up for you and wondering where you are."

Papyrus... He felt bad. Papyrus was probably wondering where he was for hours after the last reset. But then he had an attack of suspicion. He wouldn't risk Papyrus for anything. "No, not really," he said.

"I see," Aldyr said dubiously. "Let me know if you change your mind later. I think we can find a way to communicate."

"ok." Sans already wondered if he had judged Aldyr too harshly by not telling him the truth, but he figured better safe than sorry.

Safe? Since when was his brother ever _safe_ , Sans asked himself. In fact, the last time he'd seen him, Papyrus was...

His usual mask covering his feelings dropped because he simply didn't have the strength to maintain it anymore.

Aldyr noticed his tired and completely hopeless expression and gave him a thoughtful glance. "Sorry to say this...but you honestly don't look so good. Not...physically, I mean, but otherwise. I guess that's understandable, after all you told us...but...if you want to talk about it, I'm here."

"not really up to it. sorry."

Aldyr paused, trying to think of something helpful. "Just...have a little hope, I guess I want to say. Things sound like they've gotten pretty dark, but tomorrow can be better."

"sure. tomorrow." Time-related words were too ironic, after all the resets.

"Hey, you've never been here or met me before right? That proves something can change. Not everything is an endless cycle of misery. Maybe more things will keep changing, and it will get better."

That got the first spark of interest from Sans.

"i guess so..." he said, in a slightly less depressed tone of voice.

Sans buried his face in his hands.

"sometimes i just feel...like i'm losing my mind..."

Aldyr tried to encourage him. "Multiple timelines, a killer running rampant...if it were most people, they'd have probably lost it a long time ago. You're strong if you made it this far without going insane."

"i just...if your captain is really innocent, then i hurt an innocent person for the first time...i don't deserve to live..."

"No, please don't think that..." Aldyr said, putting his fork down gently. "I'm sure she knows what you've been going through and she wouldn't judge you for making a mistake..."

"...maybe...i failed so many times...couldn't save them...couldn't save them at all...their deaths were my fault..."

Sans felt a wetness on his hands from his eyesockets and tried to brush it away. Normally he would've never talked about this, but he was in such a bad state, he was desperate. In some ways, it was easier to talk about this with a stranger, than with his friends who he always tried to put on a happy face for.

"The only one responsible is the one who killed them," Aldyr said. "That's all..."

"nothing has mattered for such a long time...i die, it's reset and i come back...frisk dies, same thing...world is destroyed, who cares, it comes back...i stopped even trying to explain what was going on to alphys because she'd just _forget_ in the next reset..."

Sans trembled with the frustration of the hopeless memories. He hated being like this, but he'd kept everything inside for so long.

"but today...something actually did happen that mattered...rose was hurt, didn't reset, had to actually get healed by a doctor instead of simply loading a save like frisk? that's new...something actually mattered, there was a consequence for an action...my action...even if it was bad, there was still an actual consequence...that means maybe i can actually do something good and it would matter...it's like waking up from a long nightmare where all my actions were just hopeless habits...i wasn't even alive at all...maybe this is better, but i'm not sure this isn't just another dream or it won't just reset again..."

"We don't have the ability to reset things like that, outside of your world..." Aldyr said. "Maybe that's a good thing...And resets don't affect the ship, so you definitely don't have to worry about suddenly appearing somewhere else while you're here."

Aldyr tried to think of kind words, and said, "You've obviously got a lot of wounds inside from what happened. It's going to take time to heal, but if you got this far and survived, I know you can do it. There must be a way to make things be different from now on."

"i don't know...but you're right, this timeline is different...maybe things can actually change...thanks."

"No problem," Aldyr said. "Thanks for talking with me."

Sans felt some of his internal strength returning. Monsters were affected by the good or bad intentions of others. Aldyr's steady kindness was having a positive effect on him.


	9. Twin sparks

They finished up dinner and tidied up the kitchen.

"Think I'll head to bed and get some sleep," Aldyr said.

"you have books," Sans said. "may I?"

"Please. Read anything you like." Aldyr said. He got ready to sleep, and curled up in his own bed. His breathing slowly got regular.

Sans perused Aldyr's bookshelf. He was looking for some kind of distraction from his troubled thoughts, and anyway he tended to have insomnia most nights.

There were books on astrophysics, science fiction...right up his alley, actually.

One book was titled,

 _How to Travel the Multiverse and Enjoy It_

He read an excerpt...

 _Many different teleportation abilities work inside their given world of origin, but do not allow one to cross the interworld boundaries. A special tunneling technique allows crossing this boundary, but few Eldorants are capable of learning it, and it usually requires many years of training to acquire a moderate level of skill. In order to target one's landing zone, in particular, one must be strongly connected to not only one's own world, but have an affinity for other worlds as well. Visualization training is a must, as well as a strong sense of imagination._

"hmm...Eldorants? is that what they call themselves?" At one time he could have spent all day reading this, but lately his emotions had been taking up too much mental energy. That was one reason why he spent so much time sleeping. That and the insomnia.

He could only read it for a bit longer before his attention span quit, and he yawned, looking for something less technical to read.

One book was handwritten and handdrawn with beautiful pictures. Sans picked up that one, and took it to read in bed, wondering if Aldyr wrote it.

It looked to be a book of short stories and poems.

Sans read one of them...

 _THE FOX AND THE SPARROW_

 _Once there was a fox that was friends with a sparrow. His fox friends laughed, saying the sparrow was such a tiny, plain-looking thing and unsuited to be friends with a powerful and clever fox. He was embarrassed and defended himself, saying he only kept the sparrow around because the sparrow was so small it wasn't worth eating._

 _The sparrow sang the fox to sleep every night, and the fox protected the sparrow anytime there was danger. Over time, the fox and the sparrow grew to be great friends, and the fox no longer cared what the sparrow looked like or what the other foxes thought. Every day, the fox and the sparrow played games together, chasing each other through the forest._

 _Their friendship lasted for both their lifetimes, and even beyond that, since when they died and became spirits, they laughed and played among the stars. They say you can still see them on the most beautiful of nights, flitting from star to star and chasing each other like twin sparks in the sky._

"heh...cute story," he thought. To be friends with someone very different...there was a timeline where Frisk was the best of all at that. She made friends with everyone, even with the monsters she feared at first, like the spiders, and Asriel.

She really seemed happy at the end of that timeline, looking forward to the future along with everyone else after they escaped to the surface. She was gentle and sweet, always brightening the day and making it more fun for whoever she was with.

Monsters showed more of their personalities and playfulness with her because it was fun for them to see her reactions. Sometimes Sans knew she'd been through an area just because of the way all the monsters were smiling.

Papyrus loved having her around, and she always complimented his cooking as if she enjoyed it just because he made it, no matter how it tasted. His pleased and enthusiastic reaction to the compliments always made her grin, and she'd eat more just to have an excuse to compliment him again. The way she made his brother feel special and important warmed Sans inside more than anything else she ever did.

And she made his friends happy too. Their long imprisonment underground had made them desperate, pushing them to do things they wouldn't have done otherwise. Asgore and Alphys in particular had suffered badly from the burden of their decisions. But Frisk helped them all, her influence making them kinder and gentler than they were before, and giving them hope for a future on the surface.

Sans wondered how much of what happened later in the bad timelines was her choice. When she spared Sans in one of the fights, her eyes reminded him of the Frisk he once knew, the grey and red fog choking them briefly lifted. For an instant, her eyes were deep pools of sadness, until the fog overwhelmed her again.

It was the first hint that maybe the real Frisk didn't agree to the violence, or that she regretted it.

Ever since then, he'd tried to understand what had gone wrong inside her. By provoking her into talking, over the course of many resets, he'd learned Chara was possessing her.

It had been much more difficult to get any clues about the third entity, the Anomaly, but eventually he confirmed that they really did exist, whatever they were, and that Chara deeply resented their presence. Chara always gradually overwhelmed the Anomaly's control by the end of a run.

He learned to tell by the hue of Frisk's eyes which one was dominating more. The Anomaly was more grey, while Chara was more red. His anger at both of them grew with every reset.

Between the two of them, Frisk's original good nature seemed to be choked out.

Was there anything left of his friend in Frisk's body, or was she just an empty shell by now? Was there a way he could find out?

In any case, the knots inside of his soul had loosened just a little bit. After reading and thinking for awhile longer, Sans lowered his blue magic that was giving him light, and drifted off to sleep.


	10. Playing games

It wasn't long before Sans had another nightmare where something bad happened to Papyrus, and barely managed to keep from making a noise loud enough to wake Aldyr.

Kiro noticed, though. The wolf jumped up and inspected him with concern, and licked his cheek bone softly in sympathy. Then the wolf curled up on the bed covers by his feet. The furry warmth was a comforting presence.

He thought about things for a long time, staring into the blackness of the cabin and listening to the wolf's snores. Wondering if Papyrus was ok after the last reset.

Then when he finally fell asleep again, he dreamed of trying to solve an extremely difficult puzzle. But the puzzle was hard to sort out, like Mettaton's tile puzzle, and he couldn't think clearly while dreaming anyway.

He went in mental circles for hours trying to find a solution to the dream puzzle. Still, at least it was sleep rather than insomnia, and it was better than the terror and hopeless feeling of the other dream.

...

Elsewhere, Papyrus trudged along slowly in the forest, looking for any sign of his brother. His light cast glittering reflections off of the snow, but there was nothing to show that anyone had been here. He couldn't find Sans at any of his usual spots, and it was getting to be very late at night.

His hand bones trembled as he brushed aside branches, taking enormous care to check every single possible location in Snowdin forest, no matter how unlikely. He felt sick and lightheaded. It was an odd sign of weakness for him, but he kept going anyway.

Flowey popped his head out of the snow. "Still looking, I see."

Papyrus was glad for the company. He treated Flowey like a benevolent advisor, and hoped Flowey could help him now. "I'M SO WORRIED. I CAN'T FIND HIM ANYWHERE."

Flowey cackled. "Well, don't worry. Knowing him, he's sure to be _dying_ to get home. He's probably there right now, sleeping his life away."

Papyrus looked troubled, and not just about Sans's recent disappearance. "FLOWEY...I HAVE THE FEELING SOMETHING IS WRONG LATELY. DO YOU KNOW WHY? I KEEP HAVING MEMORIES OF SANS BEING HURT...AND ME BEING A GHOST...BUT ALL OF IT IS FUZZY...IS THAT WHY HE'S MISSING?"

Flowey looked surprised Papyrus was aware of things like that. Was... _it..._ already working? He covered it quickly though.

"Of course I know. I'm very good at things like this. Just stick close to me and we'll find a way to help him. He definitely needs some help, that's for sure. A kind brother like you ought to be there for him. I know you can do it!"

"YES YES I AM SURE I CAN...AFTER ALL I AM VERY GREAT...BUT JUST IN CASE, COULD YOU GIVE ME SOME HINTS?"

Flowey put on an all-knowing look. "No problem at all..." he said, with a slightly creepy smile, his eyes half-closed.

An icy shiver ran through his leaves and stem. _If Sans finds out, there'll be hell to pay..._

It was cruel of him to take out his frustrations on Papyrus by playing games like this. He knew that. He actually had no idea where Sans was right now, and he had no intentions of being helpful even if he did. But, he figured, a soulless flower needs some entertainment now and again, right?

Papyrus was always so obliging, it seemed impossible that anyone could be that gullible and stupid. It fed Flowey's ego to have someone listen so closely to him. He even occasionally dropped cryptic hints as a reward and a sort of taunt, doubting that Papyrus could make anything out of them anyway.

He didn't see Papyrus gazing at him with a sad expression.


	11. Pancakes and honesty

The next morning, Sans woke up to Aldyr making breakfast in the kitchen. Nearby, Kiro was chowing down on a bowl of his own food. It was strangely satisfying to watch the wolf eat, his bushy tail wagging slightly every now and again.

"Hi, Sans," Aldyr said when he noticed Sans was up. Aldyr looked cheerful. "I'm making pancakes."

"sounds nice," Sans replied. Things seemed brighter this morning. A night's rest had helped a bit.

Now that he'd had the chance to think about it, he realized Rose's real soul never really matched up with Chara's. Her eyes were kind. She'd been very intentionally trying to stop the fight without hurting him.

After a day of watching his friends and family die yet again, he hadn't been willing to believe it yesterday. But today was different. He was willing to consider the possibility she meant no harm.

He helped Aldyr with the food, like a good guest. Aldyr was impressed by the gentleness with which Sans moved, and the precise care he took with the task, despite a feigned casualness. It added to his overall impression of Sans, which had changed considerably since they'd first met.

The pancakes were excellent, hot and with berry jam.

"So, Rose is awake," Aldyr said as they ate. "We kinda had a chat about things this morning."

Sans stared down at his plate, much of his good mood gone. It was too much of a reminder of the fight in the hall, and everything else.

"She wants to see you," Aldyr told him.

"oh?" Sans muttered.

"But we're having a disagreement on that. I'm not feeling safe with having you around her after what you did, but she wants to trust you anyway. I'm acting captain at the moment, though, so what I say goes."

Sans didn't say anything, his eye sockets dark, and his face conflicted.

Aldyr spoke into the silence. "So...I guess I want to ask you...which one of us is right?"

Sans' left eye flared cyan with magic, and he said chillingly, "That depends on whether she's innocent or not."

Kiro noticed the difference in the crackling air and lifted his head from his paws with concern from where he was lying crouched on the floor.

Aldyr sat stunned for a moment, not only by the tone, but also the size and shape of Sans' words, which seemed to change when he was in a particular mood. He finally mustered the words to speak. "She's not a murderer!"

An edge of panic crept into his voice. The last thing he wanted was another fight between his captain, who he cared deeply for, and the friend he was starting to make in front of him. Right now, he just didn't know what to say to make things better.

Sans examined him carefully, seeing how freaked out he was by the situation. He spoke more kindly, leaning back and stuffing his hands in his jacket pockets.

"dude, her level of violence is over 1000. that's a lot of kills. not only that, something is wrong in her face...or her eyes. can't you sense it?"

Aldyr sighed, relaxing slightly, trying to gain strength from the solidity of the table in front of him. This was crazy. But he realized Sans was giving him a little bit of trust by even telling him this much. He would try to listen in return.

Aldyr replied thoughtfully and evenly, "I didn't see anything wrong myself, but I know she'd never hurt anyone. You can't tell me you could fight her, not get injured at all, even when she could've killed you at any time, and not sense that yourself. There's a lot of good in her."

"i'll admit, i can feel that too," Sans told him seriously. "i do have a way to prove what the truth is...but it's a special attack of mine. you'd have to let me attack her with it. if she's not guilty, she won't get hurt."

"You want to _attack_ her? You seriously think I'd let that happen?!"

Sans met his words steadily. "like i said. there's something wrong, and if it follows the pattern, even if she hasn't killed anyone yet, she will eventually. i may not know your captain well, but i know the person behind her eyes. it's the same one i've been fighting over and over."

Aldyr contemplated the idea. He didn't like it at all, but he felt that Rose should be told about this. If something was really wrong with her, then he had to help her find out the truth.

"All right," he agreed finally. "I'll trust you enough to take you to ask her about this, and we'll see what we can do," he said, standing up with a resolved expression.


	12. Missing a friend

" _Rose, I'm glad you're awake. I'm going to get Aldyr to give you an update, ok?"_ Khermos said to you over the ship's internal comm system.

" 'Kay," you replied, eager for news. All you knew was that you'd been unconscious for several hours, during which you'd evidently gotten some serious surgery, judging by the size of the bandages around your midsection.

You sat up painfully, slowly, in your white sheeted bed in your room in the med bay, grimacing from your wounds. You looked at one hand contemplatively. Trying to confirm your existence, after the strangeness of being frozen in the stasis bubble and wondering in your slightly conscious state if you were dead and this was some kind of afterlife.

Well, you were still alive, anyway. You shivered, remembering the shock of that moment when you realized you let your guard down too soon.

Sans was amazing when he fought, but for you, all of it was overshadowed by the pain in his expression. You hated what had caused it and you wanted to make things better.

But you messed up. Again. Either you really were a bad person, or you'd failed yet again to communicate, to reach another person and show them how you felt. Like so many times before. You'd tried to show Sans you meant no harm, but you must have done something wrong.

The sharp spikes of bone driving through your insides had hurt. Really hurt. But not as much as the feeling of failure, the feeling that you could never really make a difference. You couldn't help anyone, because of how messed up you were.

A feeling like black tar clogged your throat, like all the voices from the past telling you how worthless you were.

Why did you even exist if you could never show anyone how you felt?

Failure. That was the biggest word echoing in your head. Maybe you'd even made things worse.

You did basically kidnap him here, after all - and he thought you'd killed everyone he knew. What must that have been like for him? Maybe he'd freaked out, started fighting the crew, and they'd hurt him. The thought of the sound of bone cracking, bruising - _unbearable_ , and all because of _you._

You were back inside that memory again.

Thrown against the wall covered in bruises, your slight form tried to hide itself somehow from your mother, who was holding a baseball bat. Nearby, your brother egged her on, while across the room, your father watched TV and acted like he didn't hear anything.

Your dog ran to you then, whipping around and growling and snarling at your mother on your behalf, as she tried to protect you with her large, furry body.

For a moment, you felt better. The dog was the only one in the family who made you feel safe. The only one you ever wanted to hug, or cry with. Whenever anyone else in the family tried to hug you, you winced and instinctively moved away. Even when you grew up, you were never able to hug other people without feeling uncomfortable.

But then the cruel voice said, "Your dog is a _monster,_ just like _you_ , and she needs to be put down!"

The hand with the bat raised and fell on the dog's head. You tried to throw out your arm to protect her. A wisp of something that Aldyr later told you was the beginnings of your shielding ability showed itself for just an instant, unnoticed by anyone else.

But it wasn't strong enough - you were too small and frail, and both your arm and the dog's skull cracked at the same time.

You shuddered, willing yourself away from the memory. You couldn't let that happen again. Not ever.

 _"Rose?"_ Aldyr's voice poked you over the comm. " _you there?"_

"Yeah," you replied hurriedly. "Aldyr, is Sans ok?"

 _"Huh? Sure, he's fine. Sleeping at the moment."_

You closed your eyes in blissful relief.

"Good."


	13. Just under the surface

Your emotions are still so raw from your brush with death that your mind begins casting back to places it doesn't often go.

You felt the stout, thick guard hairs of her coat, layered in with extremely soft fur. It was so comforting to wrap your hands around her as she licked your cheek in acknowledgement. You were only seven, so you were small enough to actually fit inside her doghouse and be with her here, safe where no one would see you.

You didn't fully realize back then, but later you knew that the unique feeling that was there was love. That feeling was something you just don't forget. It was too rare, too special. Even if you were as pathetic as to sit shamelessly in a doghouse with your dog like you had nowhere better to be, it didn't matter, because she was there. Your heart's warm and your mouth turns up in a slight grin at the memory.

" _Captain?"_ Aldyr asks as he knocks from outside the door.

"Come in!" you yell cheerfully.

He comes in, greeting you as he does, Sans following close behind.

Sans' presence immediately causes you a rush of adrenaline, part of you afraid on a physical level because he'd literally almost killed you yesterday, and another part honestly worried about him.

You give Sans a quick once over, inspecting him for any damage. You exhale with a sigh of relief when you see he does look uninjured as Aldyr had said.

Physically, at least. You can still see the mistrust, the trigger-fire reaction that lurks just beneath the surface. You recognize it because there's a part of you that's exactly the same way.

This time, you keep both your inner and main shield up. What could go wrong as long as you stay cautious this time?

At least he doesn't look like he's about to attack you. He definitely looks better than he did yesterday.

You realize then that he's giving you a quick once over too, his gaze lingering on your bandages. When you dare to look at his eyelights, you see some kind of deep sadness warring with hatred and anger. When he looks up and your eyes met, you see the hatred flare and his jaw tense, and you don't understand why. You glance away, suddenly afraid.

Aldyr keeps a sharp eye on both of you and subtly changes his stance, preparing to interfere if he has to. Sans notices, and intentionally softens his expression.

He breaks the tension. "look, i _really_ don't want this to end up like last time. i don't want to hurt you if you're not the one who did this. i can tell you have some good inside and i don't want to get it wrong this time."

He looks away, apparently to try to help contain his feelings.

You think a moment, and respond carefully,

"I truly don't mean you any harm, Sans. I didn't kill your friends. Why do you seem like you hate me when you look at me?"

He forces himself to meet your gaze again. "besides the fact that your LV is over a thousand? it's your eyes," he says shortly. "they're red."

"Huh?" you wonder, completely perplexed. It sinks in. "What... _Chara_?!"

 _Oh. Ohhhhhhh._

"not just red. when i look at your eyes, i can see that exact kind of red she has."

 _Like bright red blood._ You know too well what he means. You've watched enough runs of other players to know.

"So it wasn't just the LV," you say, your heart sinking like stone. "You had your reasons."

"yeah, you could say that," he says wryly, leaning back against the wall and putting his hands in his jacket pockets with a sort of feigned casualness.

Aldyr walks forward and looks deep into your eyes. "They look normal to me. I don't see any red," he remarks, confused.

"the red's behind her eyes...it's kinda hard to explain, but Frisk was like that too. when she fought, all the red came to the surface, and you could see it without looking for it."

"Am I...really evil then?" you wonder aloud. It's a strange rhetorical question, but you don't know what else to say.

Sans sighs, closing his eyes briefly.

"hate's so easy isn't it? assuming the other person has bad intentions."

The note in his deep voice compels you to look up at him.

"tell me. you're from that world, right? i've always wondered. why did you do this to us? your people?"

The unexpectedly gentle tone is making your heart break.

"Sans..." you whisper.

You suppose you should try to say something. Anything that might be comforting.

"My world...has got issues," you finally say. _Wow, that was awkward_ , you berate yourself.

He lets out a short, sarcastic breath, almost a scoff. "i think, kid, that's an understatement."

You close your mouth. Everything you think of sounds unbearably trite. So instead you try to say something by your expression, remembering he is uncannily good at reading faces.

"hmmm...your expression is really earnest. are you saying you didn't want this?"

" _Never,"_ you almost cry. "Not after Flowey told me the truth. He told me monsters have families, when I killed one Froggit, thinking it was just a game. I reset it all, and never killed again."

"at least that fucker did one good thing, then," he says bitterly.

"Sans," you swallow hard. "I am truly sorry. My world is dark, and cold. The darkness in our hearts is reflected in what's been going on here. I've tried to not be like that, but I can feel that part of my heart is...broken, or frozen. Not all of it, I hope."

You have the unfortunate flaw of telling people too much about your emotions, making them think of you as naiive or childish sometimes. You hope you don't seem too much like that now.

He doesn't seem to mind your rambling, though.

"can i see it," he says, glancing away like he's embarrassed by his own question.

"Huh?" you ask, confused.

"your heart, your soul. i know that i shouldn't normally be asking, it's private, but maybe i can tell what's wrong."

"Really? How?" you wonder curiously.

'you'd have to lower that inner shield."

Ah. That sounds like a problem.

"What if...you find what you're looking for?" you ask slowly.

"then i have an idea of how i could attack it without wounding you. it's based on the idea that you're really who you say you are though. you'll get hurt if you're not."

"Umm..." you stall for time. What were all of his attacks again? Was this about what they were saying about how he was really strong against genocide players, because of- "Karma?"

"yeah."

"That's _all_ you're going attack with?" you say dubiously. You hated to mistrust him, but it wasn't like there weren't some pretty scary AU Sans out there. Hopefully he wasn't one of those. How many times has he gone through a - never mind, not thinking about that right now. It was too dizzyingly horrifying to contemplate.

"I'm sorry, it's just...trust is hard...after all _this,"_ you say, gesturing downward at your body.

"tough, i know. it's a lot to ask," he says, with a sense of melancholy that you can tell isn't just about you.

You can tell he's trying to be diplomatic, give you a little bit of the benefit of the doubt, but he's also not sure that you're not an enemy too.

 _He's angry too,_ you realize. Like you. That feeling of crying against...you don't know what, just that there's something out there in the universe that feels _wrong_. Something that controls your destiny against your will. It's a little comforting that you both have something in common, and it gives you the willpower to try to think through this problem.

You say nothing for several moments, contemplating as you fiddle with the soft blanket under your hands.

The ship. The ship. Everything has to be about the ship and its hundreds of crewmembers, even more than anyone here, no matter how much you personally care about them. That's your responsibility as the captain. The first priority has to be to protect the ship. There's only one way to do that, assuming Sans is right, which you think is likely. You have to get off the ship.

You'd seen from watching the other players what Chara could do to an entire world. That last huge downward strike of red looms large in your mind. What could her blade do to a ship that was tiny in comparison? She wasn't a low level Chara either, if she was the one making your LV so high. You wonder where she got all the EXP from, since it usually wasn't possible to get that much in any kind of run. But right now it didn't matter.

You concentrate on making your mind a blank. If something really is inside you, you don't want it to know what you're planning. Unfortunately, that also means you won't be able to explain your plans in advance. If you say anything, it might provoke Chara to attack, and you can't risk a fight on the ship. Hopefully they'll understand.

 _* What is she doing? Is she intentionally not thinking anymore, so I can't read her thoughts? How foolish. She can't keep that up for long!_

Your blood runs cold and your stomach twists at the sudden, alien presence you feel inside. How long was it there? You suddenly realize you've been feeling something odd for awhile, and now it's growing fast. There isn't much time-

You get up, slowly but actually going as quickly as you can, swinging your legs over the side of the bed and stumbling a bit as your feet connect with the floor. It hits you that you've probably lost a lot of blood and you're still pretty weak. But stopping isn't an option. Aldyr sharply intakes his breath with empathy, knowing this is probably costing you a lot, and visibly worrying about you reopening your wounds.

You hold both of their gazes for a moment, and turn and put out a hand, focusing and opening a tunnel swirling with dark blue energy. After several seconds, it's ready, and you turn and enter, ducking inside the narrow entrance.

You don't know how long you'll last at this rate, or what this thing inside of you will do to you, but whether you live or die, at least this way the ship won't be affected.

The tunnel is still open behind you and you hear Sans and Aldyr talking for a moment. You really aren't sure if they'll follow you in, or if they should. At this point, you can only trust their judgment.

You wonder what they're thinking of you. How mysterious must they think you're acting right now? But at least if they don't come with you, they'll be safe from you, you think morosely.


	14. The gray element

Aldyr made a move to enter the tunnel.

"this is an obvious trap, you know," Sans said.

Aldyr glanced back at him.

"Yeah," Aldyr agreed ruefully. "This could get really bad, but I can't just let her go alone. I think she's trying to go somewhere she can't hurt us. Do you want to come, or stay here?"

Sans thought for a second or two, and decided, "i can't let that thing inside her go. i've still got a bone to pick with it."

"All right," Aldyr agreed.

He gave Sans an apologetic glance, ran to him, and slung Sans over one shoulder.

"wait, what-?"

"Hold on, just let me-you're a little heavier than you look-I just gotta protect us both with a shield, ok? The tunnel is dangerous without a shield," Aldyr explained.

"uh, ok-"

Aldyr ran for the tunnel, entering as it was just about to close.

The wormhole-like tunnel twisted and turned, with sides of sapphire energy that crashed around them like sea waves. They both felt a sudden maelstrom of forces that pushed everything forward like a river. Aldyr's shield protected them from the sides, turning them into a giant marble shooting through a pipe.

Aldyr leaned forward into it, like a parachuter finding the most aerodynamic position, increasing his speed. They started to catch short glimpses of Rose when the tunnel straightened out for a bit.

"this is weird," Aldyr heard Sans mutter. Looking over at him, Aldyr saw he had some kind of unusual glow in his eyelights, but it was hard to decipher. Was it too optimistic to think he looked just a little bit happy?

" _i'm actually enjoying this,"_ Sans thought. " _i guess the scientist part of me thinks this is awesome. the energy making this doesn't feel like it's coming from something bad, either. i didn't expect to have anything like fun...especially under these circumstances. but trying to figure out how this works is a welcome distraction compared to what's usually going through my skull."_

Suddenly everything seemed to shudder, the tunnel straightened out, and they could see an exit far up ahead. But both the exit and the tunnel walls were disintegrating fast.

"It's breaking apart!" Aldyr yelled.

"hey, do you think you could throw me?"

Aldyr looked surprised by the idea but nodded. There was no way they'd both get there in time.

He hesitated, and said one last thing. "Sans, her real name is ~~~~. It's important to her."

"what-?"

Gathering all his strength, he threw Sans forward, the momentum making him somersault as he released the skeleton monster over his head.

Sans came flying out of the tunnel exit fast, but flipped over and landed gracefully on his feet, with the skill that came from too many battles. He looked back to see the tunnel disintegrate completely. He didn't know where Aldyr ended up - somewhere in space and time? Trapped between worlds? Sans hoped he was alive, but nothing could be done for him now.

Sans took stock of his current location.

" _the air is filled with the dust of monsters, and it's pitch black. whatever i'm standing on isn't normal ground. i'd guess this could be my world after chara got through with it, but i thought it got reset? did she destroy it_ _again_ _? or is this just a different timeline than my own?"_

He summoned a ball of blue fire and sent it high in the air. He soon spotted Rose lying haphazardly a few dozen meters away.

He drew closer to her, and saw she was in a semi-conscious state, eyes cracked half-open and burning red like live coals, and her breath ragged. Every few seconds her body twitched violently.

Sans sensed that her shield was completely down, and when he focused, he could see Chara's soul latched onto hers, as if it was a leech biting down. It seemed to have found a weak spot in a hole on the bottom left part of her soul heart.

Sans sighed, feeling sympathy. He was in a merciful mood, and he'd eaten the pancakes of friendship. He felt like a part of his real self had returned that he'd been starting to lose. Even though it was awful being in this battle _again_ , he was no longer tight-rope walking on the edge of sanity like before.

" _this world is dead. the only thing at stake here is our two lives. i can afford to play it safe this time,"_ he reasoned. " _i can try to help."_

So instead of bone attacks, he sent a wave of karma to drive Chara away. But when it touched Rose, she yelped, flinching and jumping away. She landed in a crouched position, tense as an animal.

She waited in a battle stance, and he got the impression that the slightest move would provoke her to attack.

But she was focusing hard on his shape, trembling with the effort and blinking, as though seeing him through a fog.

 _"she's trying not to think of me like an enemy,"_ Sans thought. _"what is chara doing to her mind? i can only imagine."_

"Sa-" she tried to talk but couldn't quite make the words.

Her left arm's muscles clenched suddenly, and suddenly they both noticed a vein of red molten liquid was crawling up her arm. Rose's eyes widened in horror, and she jerked away like she was pulling on metaphorical strings controlling her, and turned and ran.

" _it's a nice gesture,"_ Sans thought, _"trying to keep herself away from me, but it's not going to help. she's only going to get worse."_

Sans lifted a hand, using blue magic to grab and hold onto her soul, pulling her back from her forward momentum.

A foreign voice whispered through Rose's mind, and she shivered, but it wasn't even talking to her.

 _* What next, a throw then a bone attack? Wish he'd make it harder. I've seen this before._

Sans brought a wave of karma down on her, now that she couldn't move.

* _Ok, karma. Where's the open spot I can move to? Wait, I really can't move at all? I have to use Transform already? Lame._

...

Suddenly you were flooded with every painful memory from your past - the hits, the bruises, the lashing words, the mind games, the dread of the holidays which meant more time with _them_.

You crouched to the ground, bringing the backs of your hands to your eyes to wipe at the tears like you would when you were a very small child. At the same time, you were only vaguely aware that you were screaming, and the sounds were becoming more and more like those of a frightened rabbit and less like those of a human.

You wanted to run, but red haze danced at the edges of your vision, and burnt your skin like fire when you moved. You tried to beat it back, to fight, as something giggled and laughed.

You were vaguely aware that this was a trick, and most of what you were seeing and feeling probably wasn't even real. You tried to center yourself and defy the will of whatever was affecting you. But something gray and dispassionate took over from the red, controlling your limbs, and in your weakened state you couldn't stop this new enemy. Its desires consumed your own until you couldn't even remember your own name.


	15. Are you worth defending

You struggle in a panic, sensing the danger even as you lose the where and when of the present, but your efforts are useless against the rising force of the black tide that blanks out everything in your mind except what you're forced to remember.

...

You crouch over the lifeless furry body of your faithful dog, crying like you've never cried before. "You killed her!" you scream at your mother. You feel desperately for a sign of life beneath her fur, but there is none. The only constant warmth in your life, the only one who felt anything like a real mother to you and gave you unconditional love, is gone.

For the first time, your brother's face shows sympathy for you, and shock at what happened, glancing between you and the dog. Apparently this is enough to bother even him. He's your parents' darling, and he's never before shown any concern for how you or the dog are treated.

He devotes most of his time to building his image as a highly moral, upstanding person. You'd once caught him writing anonymous fan mail about himself and his acts of self-sacrifice to the local newspaper. He'll do anything to increase his popularity and stay on his parents' good side.

But he never said a word the dozens of times you were bruised, while he was left unscathed, or when your mother threatened to get rid of your dog, screaming that you loved the dog more than her.

He didn't say anything when she suddenly let the dog out of the car in the middle of a busy road in town and then drove away with the three of you. You'd had to walk for miles to find your dog again, scared all the time she'd been run over and hurt or killed, or lost forever.

You'd gotten the idea somewhere that an older brother was supposed to defend his sister, but he never has in his life. Instead, he often joins in while your mother berates and insults you, occasionally helping her to chase you down for another beating.

Until now. "Mom, that's-why did you-," he starts to protest haltingly, moving forward almost as if he's going to get between your mother and you. Then he stops, trapped and frozen with a sharp glance from your mother at him as she whips her head around.

Her hand tightens on her blunt weapon, and you wince, wondering what or who she's going to hit next.

But as small as it was, your brother's action changes you, showing you that someone else thinks this is terribly wrong. In the short time your mother's head is turned away from you, it's as if a lifelong trance has been broken. " _Never again,"_ silent words start murmuring in your mind.

Every other time before, you'd let yourself be hit by her, since protesting or crying just triggered her predatory side so that she beat you even more brutally. When you were little, there was no other option.

But now, you suddenly realize, you're a teenager. You might be small and weak for your age, but you're no longer a child staring up at a powerful giant. Maybe if your dog thought you were worth defending, you should too.

Your despair is overcome by anger, and the anger turns into resolve and action. You rise up and push your mother away from you until her back hits the opposite wall.

You're holding her arms away from you so she can't hit you, not actually hurting her but showing a fierceness that had never been there before. Your arm throbs where she'd fractured it with the bat, but you're past worrying about the pain.

Her eyes show sudden panic and fear, and a growing realization of what your expression is saying to her. _"It's over,"_ it says without words. _"Your days of doing this to me, and to those I love, are done."_

Suddenly, your father moves in, and grabs your arm roughly. He'd been sitting so mutely, working on his computer and watching TV, seemingly oblivious, that you hadn't even realized when he'd stood up.

"You're out of control!" he bellows at you.

You look at him disbelievingly. Surely he wasn't going to take her side even now-!

"Why are you being such a jerk," he says, his words insanely disproportionate to the situation.

"She killed my dog!" you hiss, almost baring your teeth. You've been pushed to almost the absolute edge, and you don't have much left.

"It's your own fault for misbehaving! You're like an animal, you're so out of control!" he yells, puffing out his chest and making sure you're aware of his large stature and bulging muscles. "Let her go!" he orders.

He pulls at you, yanking you away. You see your father clench his fist, and know he's considering hitting you. He doesn't do it often, but you know he's capable of it, from past experience. When he does, he does a lot more damage than your mother.

Not just physically, but emotionally. He acts like he's in your corner some of the time. He often gives you expensive presents during family holidays and compliments you for doing well at school. He even occasionally takes you down to his workshop and does small projects with you. It makes you start to think that he really cares, and that you're a real person, not just a shadow flitting around trying not to be noticed.

But then he does things like this. The fact that he often acts nicer to you than she does makes it all the more gut-wrenching when he betrays you like this and takes her side. It hurts worse than the physical pain. You often wish he would just be mean all the time like her, because it would be less painful.

He draws back his arm, closing his hand into a fist-

At that moment, the sense of injustice peaks inside you, and you feel nothing but primal fear and rage.

They would never know it, but at that exact moment they lost a daughter forever.

"Don't you care she was hitting me!? Have you ever cared?" you yell at him, crossing your arms over your face to try to protect yourself. "My face is black and blue!"

How crazy to ask that question of someone about to hit you, a wiser part of you thinks sardonically.

He hesitates, seeing the change in you. His usual bullying tactics aren't going to work. You're beyond giving in to threats of violence.

"If you do anything to her, I'm calling the police," he says, suddenly switching tactics and dropping his arm. He's playing the rational authority figure now.

"And I'll tell them she was hitting me!" you scream, completely at your emotional limit. "She killed my dog!"

"I'll tell them you were out of control and it was self-defense. We'll all say that," he says in a self-satisfied way, looking at your brother and mother for confirmation. Your mother nods in agreement.

Your brother just stares blankly straight ahead with too-wide, too-bright eyes, as if he's hypnotized, until he realizes they're gazing expectantly at him, and then he nods quickly.

Your face tenses with disappointment. " _You should know better,"_ your expression says to him. He'd been your last hope. He looks away, ashamed.

"Fuck you," you say quietly, your voice ragged. "Fuck all of you."

You turn, almost blind now from tears, and stumble away and head to your room. Crying and blubbering silently lest they should hear, you gather a few of your things in your backpack and in an old worn piece of luggage.

You go to the garage and get your little red wagon out, a childhood toy. Not meeting their eyes, you gather up your dead dog in your arms, put her in the wagon, and leave the house.

You know you're an embarrassing and maybe even terrifying sight in front of the neighbors as you walk down the sidewalk, face bruised, pulling a dead dog, with tears streaming down your face. You wonder if your family will try to get you to come back, but you don't hear anyone calling out after you.

The clasp on your luggage breaks as you carry it, and all your clothes fly out. You have to gather it all up again and figure out a way to tie it closed, feeling like the whole neighborhood's watching you. You're hyperventilating with panic, and your heart is pounding.

You only relax a little when you've gotten five blocks away, not even caring which direction you're going. That's when the adrenaline ebbs away and the sadness hits you with full force. You pull the wagon off the side of the road to a semi-private cluster of trees and bushes, where you knee over the body of your friend and wail.


	16. Do you prefer fire or ice

Sans winced at the way the anomaly roughly tugged at Rose's soul, ripping it away from his own blue magic. The anomaly didn't seem to understand how fragile souls were, even human souls. Even when he was using the full force of a gravity attack, it moved her soul anyway, not caring about the subtle tears that it made.

He could confirm his guess now that she'd been intentionally not using her shields before, because now they came back with full force, pushing him away. There was no chance of reaching her soul now.

Had she been holding back for real, or had that just been to lure him in close? He'd thought he'd been reading her correctly before, back in the medbay, and that she'd meant what she said, but now he wasn't so sure.

How much could he blame the anomaly's control for the emotions he was sensing? Sans could feel the waves of malice rippling off of Rose, and it weakened his already incredibly low defenses.

While before her outer shield was soft and blue, now it was burning like fire, and one didn't have to be an expert at reading expressions to see the fury in her face.

Now freed, she took a fighting stance, well-balanced and ready to spring, one hand on the ground, as she locked her gaze on him like an eagle targeting its prey.

As she did so, the red fire in Rose's eyes died down into a hazy, calm gray that was somehow even more disturbing. The anomaly's presence was more powerful now. It was like what had been there with Frisk, guiding her movements, so subtly that it had blended in with Chara's presence at first. But now it was somehow...more. Stronger. It was impossible to miss the threads of its magic.

Rose rushed forward lightening fast and drew her melee weapon, and only Sans' quick reaction speed saved him from her strikes. As time went on, she fought more and more with that absentminded, heartless style he had come to know only too well.

 _"it's such a stupid, familiar dance-"_

Sans thought as he dodged, his mood blackening quickly. It was hard to care. This time he didn't even have to force himself to care, right? There was no one left here to protect, everyone was dead, the king was dead, the world itself was dead, there was _nothing_ left...

He tried shortcutting away, farther than she could run in days. But she tunneled, following him.

As she came out of the tunnel, she saw him raise his head and give her that look of anger she'd seen him cast on others so many times, or at least the other versions of himself had.

The darkness that surrounded them made the glare in his eyelights and the glow of his magic stand out all the more, and she backed away a step.

"you're not just a puppet," he said. "i know it has to be the real you doing this, because i read how that skill of yours requires your imagination."

Her eyes flickered a bit at that, but it wasn't enough.

She came at Sans again, fighting coldly, silently. As he dodged, he felt his stamina drain as the malicious intent choked his will to live, and he prepared to die again. Would he come back this time? This wasn't his own timeline. Maybe the rules were different.

Part of him almost - _almost_ \- hoped not, so that the nightmare would be over, for him at least. It wasn't like it had been an option before, knowing the world would just get reset again. He'd considered it thoroughly in order to determine if his not being around might lessen the anomaly's interest in continuing to kill. Along with more emotion-based reasons.

But, he wondered, what would it mean for one anomaly to control another, especially when one of them had her abilities? Would that make them twice as dangerous, twice as unstoppable, or more? How many timelines would they destroy besides his own? With that thought, giving up wasn't an option.

However, even the magic that connected his bones was feeling weak and unstable, and he felt on the verge of collapsing. He felt himself sink into that familiar despair that came before every killing blow.

In desperation, Sans tried one more thing.

"is this _really_ all you are, ~~~~?" he asked, using what you thought of as your real name.

...

Hearing that, you paused, frozen in mid-strike. His hope grew a little at that, and he pushed on.

"where's the girl who let me attack her for hours, without once fighting back, because you wanted to save _me_?"

Finally, he saw a break in the fog of your mind, as you shuddered and stopped for a moment.

That name wasn't something that belonged to the dark parts of your past, and hearing it broke some of the anomaly's control over you.

You were still mostly trapped in a nightmare constructed of fears and traumatic memories, but it seemed you'd regained a bit of yourself back.

You started moving again and continued to fight, but Sans could see something was different now.

You no longer fought with that dispassionate, efficient focus on making the kill, where no move was wasted.

You fought with anger and feeling, making unnecessarily wide, sweeping blows as if saying something with every one of your movements.


	17. just because you were hurt

At this new, slower pace, Sans found he could just keep up, but it was close, and he knew he'd still tire soon.

"why do humans have to be so damned resilient," he grumbled. "even with wounds she's still this determined."

She was destroying herself with this, he could see - humans weren't supposed to leak blood through their clothes like that.

But something was driving her on anyway, and he knew that it came from her now, not the anomaly.

The next time she brushed by him, the heat in her shield almost seared his bones, but he was close enough to see the fierce resolution in her face.

In that split second, he tried to read meaning from her expression.

"Why," it said, "why why _why..."_ as if it was the only word her soul knew.

" _is it because i wounded her so badly before? no...this kind of pain doesn't come from physical wounds."_

Distracted for an instant, Sans lost the rhythm of the fight, and then he saw the lie in her strikes. She might've destroyed him in that moment, but she went wide, intentionally.

Sans looked at her keenly, and stopped trying to dodge. Her bluff called now, she paused.

"if you want to say something, you know you can use words, right?" he said with irony.

She looked confused for a moment, as if maybe she'd actually forgotten that she was sentient and had the use of more language than a single word. Her nose wrinkled. " _Why."_ she snarled like an animal.

He was taken aback by the raw emotion in the sound. The anger lashed across the space between them like a whip, but it was still better than the cold cruelty he usually faced in battle. Monsters could feel the strong emotions of humans, like something in the air, and right now, there was a distinct lack of malice in her anger, as if it had all burned away.

He stood at ease, but with all his magical weaponry poised and ready to fight as long as he had to. One of the Gaster Blasters growled quietly behind a mouthful of gathered energy.

She should've been scared, but in some distant part of her mind, she found the sight of his strength oddly comforting.

Her shield was unstable now, like a flickering flame. Through the gaps in its protection, Sans saw her gasp as the anomaly choked her heart with silver tendrils of magic, attempting to force her obedience, but her soul pushed back, trying to free itself.

"you're hurting. that's obvious," Sans said to her. "not just physically, i mean. but just because you were hurt, it doesn't make it right to hurt others."

She blinked as if her vision was blurry, hesitating.

"is that why you stopped? because you know that?" Sans asked softly.

Her expression changed then, for the better, and she suddenly crumpled and let herself fall to the strange ground. She fought to stay conscious, sitting up and hugging her knees to her chest. Sans saw the anomaly's gray magic flutter around her, trying to force her to stand and fight, but her own feelings were driving her to resist its pull. The anomaly was losing its control over the storm it had created.

"We were comrades in a war," Rose whispered hollowly. "There was nothing I wanted more than for you to defend me. How many times was I bruised and beaten in front of you? But it took my dog dying before you'd even say a word of protest."

Sans looked at her strangely, confused. " _who's she talking to?_ _someone in her past, maybe?"_

Looking back later on it, she'd be hugely embarrassed by this...talking about things from the past, blaming someone as if they were the person from back then who hurt her... But at this moment, her words were driven by a deep, instinctual, emotional part of her, and nothing else seemed to matter.

" _Why?_ " she continued. "Do you know how much it would've meant to me if you'd spoken up for me, instead of standing by her while she hurt me and acting like you didn't care? We could've ended her tyranny together. _But you just stood there."_

The sorrow in her voice grew desperate. "Why!? I thought you were my brother! Didn't that mean anything to you? Because it sure did to _me_!"

Sans froze at those words of condemnation, and quick as light, he shortcut away, halfway across the world.

This time, she didn't follow him. She held her knees and rocked back and forth, crying and trying to make her way out of the maze of the past.


	18. A little humor

Time slows to a dull thud, matching the beating of your heart, the only sound besides your breathing in this empty space.

Your body jerks sporadically, and you know the red and the gray are trying to force you up, and force you to fight, but you're mentally moving beyond their influence.

They'd tried to use your anger against you, to force you to fight.

And it had worked...for a while. But they'd pushed you just a little too far. They didn't know you well enough to understand what happened when you got pushed too far.

You got very, very determined.

No matter what you've been through, you don't want to hurt anyone else.

Several minutes pass, and you feel yourself dying. Fighting like this has reopened your wounds, and now your life force is leaking away. Resignedly, you try to delay the inevitable by going into stasis.

You can only manage it partway, though, and the golden shield fights against the influence of what is controlling you. The mix of gold, gray and red surrounding you doesn't look pretty. But it's the best you can do, for now.

After a time, Sans reappears.

This time you see him, not...the person you'd been shouting about. The haze has had time to lift.

He looks you over carefully.

"ya still in a fighting mood?' he asks you.

The anomaly fights desperately to push you back into its vision of your memories, to reclaim you, but the pain medicine has really started to wear off now. Remembering what caused your injuries keeps bringing you back to the present.

* _Aren't you angry about what he did to you?_

" _No."_ you mutter inside your head since you don't have control over your voice yet. " _He saw you in me. You're making me fight. I don't want to."_

Sans sees your inner conflict, and decides to give you a little push.

"hey, what did the hungry psychopath say to the skeleton?" he quips.

The anomaly forces you to growl menacingly, which just makes things funnier to the real you.

"do you want a pizza me?"

That makes you smile, and you're shocked to realize you're able to do it for real now.

Suddenly things don't seem so bad. The anomaly's remaining silver threads over your heart weaken as you laugh out loud. You realize you can just barely manage to push its influence aside to control your body and abilities.

You're not sure if you can speak coherently and surrender, so you speak with actions instead. You let down your shields, and put all your focus into not moving. You tremble with the effort of remaining still like a rock against the crushing waves of their mental pressure. " _Sans,"_ you whisper faintly.

Sans takes the hint and brings down a wave of karma on you. Chara's soul and the tendrils of the gray anomaly are badly damaged, and they loosen their hold on your soul. You feel them scream from the pain of touching his karma, but they don't want to let go of you.

For you, though, his karma doesn't hurt. It's kind of like taking a bitter medicine of herbs. It brings back lots of memories where you wish you would have done things differently, and been kinder and stronger, but it feels like a healthy kind of regret.

You take the opportunity to create a shield from deep inside the inner core of your being and enlarge it gradually, slowly driving the anomaly and Chara back from your soul.

Sans concentrates, his left eye glowing, and uses his gravity and karma attacks to push them away, trying to help you as best he can.

Chara jerks her soul away as the karma hits her soul again, fleeing away from further attacks, splitting off from the gray tendrils she'd been entwined in.

It tears at your spirit badly, but together with Sans, you force them both away, driving them back into the darkness.

Then you lock yourself away from their influence by solidifying and closing your shield behind them, taking relief in the absence of the thorny anger and the indifferent cruelty they'd been infecting you with.

Now beyond your strength, you transform your shield once more into its golden stasis form, barely conscious within. It feels like a droplet of cold fear runs down your back as you feel the anomaly's wispy tendrils knocking against your shield, trying to work its way back inside.

You lie on your back on the ground, shuddering as you watch its attempts to break inside. But you know the kind of soul attack it uses now, and you build up your shield's defenses against its attempts to break in and control you again.

You feel it give up and move away. You worry about its next move, and Sans, still out there and without a shield like yours, but there's nothing more you can do.


	19. Storm cloud

Sans put out his hand and touched the golden bubble holding Rose inside softly, experimentally. It seemed as solid as before, although it felt a little cushiony and gave a bit under the bones of his hand. It was almost completely opaque, and he could barely see her well enough to confirm she was breathing. Her breathing was incredibly slow, but maybe that was the point.

 _"well, what now?"_ he wondered.

It felt so unusual that he'd even ask himself that question. For so long his life had been planned for him, pre-destined. Like a rut so deep he could never deviate from its track.

But here, there were no easy answers, no script to follow to its inevitable conclusion.

It was a disorienting, but exhilarating feeling, like the first breath of spring after a long, cold winter. Or the first sight of a sun after being trapped for years in a cave...

" _yeah...let's not go there,"_ he told himself.

He sensed a large and powerful presence draw near. It felt like an ominous presence that cut a harsh path through the latent magic drifting in the air.

A bitter laughter came from the darkness, into the halo of light created by Rose's yellow shield and Sans' cyan magic.

* _So, you decided to spare this time. Do you know how many times I've seen you pretend to spare and kill anyway? I'm not complaining. I was getting bored._

By some instinct, Sans knew that this time it was really _them._ This was the true anomaly he'd been looking for. The slight presence he'd felt before from Rose's soul was nothing compared to how this felt. It was like a toxic gas had invaded the area.

The cloudy haze of it seemed to gather in one place, and it formed a roughly humanoid shape. Its gray body was indefinite like lassoed storm clouds, and it had eyes like pieces of magma.

Sans had some ability to sense magic and souls without visible light, and he reached out with that sense now. He sensed plenty of magic from the anomaly, but it seemed to have no soul of its own.

" _heh. soulless. that's damned appropriate_. _on the other hand, it could be something that can store its soul somewhere else,_ " he thought. " _after all this time fighting it when it was using frisk as a puppet, it turns out to look like a big storm cloud. who would've thought?"_

"turns out you're not really human at all, then, huh?" Sans asked it. "i wondered about that, for a long time. but it doesn't look you are one after all."

As it spoke, its voice was strange, as if it was more felt than heard.

* _You were always good at thinking things through. That's why you're so much fun to fight. I would never have made so many runs, or bothered to kill the other monsters, if it weren't for you._

Sans chuckled, his magic glowing dangerously. "i doubt that. sick fucks like you kill just because they can."

It shrugged, bringing up poorly formed, hazy arms in an expression of wry, cruel coldness.

* _Don't blame me. I am what I was made to be. Can I help it if I want to do a run or two just for fun?_

Sans shook his head. "you were never _made_ to be anything," Sans told it. "why did you choose to kill?"

It laughed dryly, mockingly.

* _Don't you know what happens when enough people feel something? A god gets created. I'm there in every fight against you, Sans. Every player who fights you has me by their side. I am what they made me._

Sans closed his eyes briefly, and when he opened them there was only blackness inside.

"Do you think we're just here for you to play with? That we're nothing more than that?" he asked, his voice shaking with anger.

Its red eyes narrowed. It replied tritely, like it had lost all sense of the value of life. Or maybe it never had any to begin with.

 _* I mean, that's the point, right? I help players to let out all their frustrations. And I enjoy the fights, even though they are incredibly boring when you keep doing the same things, because I can feel the players' emotions..._

Experimentally, Sans subtly sent a hail of very slight spears of magic, not big enough to be called bones, through the central cloud of the anomaly. The hail went right through it, and the anomaly didn't seemed to notice.

" _i mist,"_ Sans thought, chuckling to himself silently. " _nice to see its powers of observation have their limits, though."_

The puffs of clouds nearby twitched and Sans realized the anomaly had caught his amused expression, and was annoyed by it - maybe it thought he was laughing at what it was saying.

" _the anomaly never did have a good sense of humor - or fun,"_ Sans thought. " _guess that's why it's so messed up in the head - or whatever passes for its head."_

Based on his experiment, it seemed normal attacks weren't going to work on it. After it had detached from Rose, it had withdrawn itself and there was no longer any semblance of a soul.

Maybe it had changed its own properties somehow so that it was no longer vulnerable to attacks. Sans decided he wouldn't waste his effort trying. Instead, he'd keep it talking, get it to share more details about itself.

It was still talking and droning on, so right now that wasn't difficult.

* ... _Their thrill of battle because of how strong you are. Their happiness when they finally beat you. Their slight regret when you die. Their emotions, and the way you fight against all of it, is what makes it all worth it to me._

"i get it," Sans gritted out, not wanting to hear any more. He felt like he was going to throw up in disgust, even though that shouldn't be possible for him.

"you're the sad-ist little piece of shit around."

It suddenly grabbed him from behind with newly formed, long and thin clouds, and began trying to squeeze the life out of him. Sans tried to use magic to do something, teleport away, anything - but its gray mist seemed to stop his magic. It got worse, until his ribcage was aching and he knew it was beginning to interfere with his soul's ability to maintain life.

* _A sadist?_

It laughed.

 _* Of course. Didn't you always know that? Not just about me, but about the players who fought you so many times? I am their agent, acting out their will. It was always me. Chara and Frisk are_ **my** _puppets._ _It was amusing to have you blame them, but I like how you can see me for once. It might be fun to_ _ **crush**_ _you for real._

Sans stopped physically struggling, and tried to focus on psychologically analyzing his enemy, gathering his thoughts. " _it's prone to lashing out. it wouldn't get so angry if it was happy with what it is. at least it's talking - dunno how to read facial expressions on this thing, other than maybe the shape of its eyes."_

He spoke to it again, hoping for more information. Something he could use, maybe even past a death and a reset, if they had those here.

"i saw the game," Sans said, speaking frankly, and gritting his teeth to bear the pain of the anomaly's crushing force.

"i guess i had some dumb hope that what you did had some reason behind it other than your own entertainment, like you were trying to accomplish something to save your own people somehow. like it was all some kind of sick, misguided experiment where you had to do so many trials to find out something you needed. but that sliver of hope's gone now. it was kind of a pathetic hope anyways, thinking you had any kind of soul after what you did."

The air stilled.

 _* Oh? You were really trying to believe that about me?_

it said with feigned casualness. But it also sounded intrigued.

 _* So you understand what the game is, huh? Not many of the you's have seen it._

It seemed to deliberate.

 _* Maybe I'll let you live for now, since you know about that. Just to see if things get interesting. There's nothing you can do to change anything, but it might be fun to see you try. You're really not much fun dead, and I can't just reset you back when you're not in your own home world._

It released him from its grasp, and Sans fell with a clatter of bones to the ground. That really _hurt._ He tried not to show the anomaly how much, but he was sorely physically weakened now. Its intent had almost killed him.

"so you just want more entertainment. we really are just toys to you, aren't we?" Sans said mockingly, bitterly, but underneath his words held some long built-up feelings of despair.

He'd suspected this was how empty the anomaly's reasons really were, but having it confirmed directly was...well, he'd rather not try to describe it.

On the other hand, maybe having a solid answer was better, so that he knew for sure what to think of the anomaly. Sans had decided long ago that he'd always rather know the truth about things no matter how painful it was for him personally.

Still, if he hadn't had a short break from dealing with all of this, he'd be in a much worse state. He'd have probably died already, his soul lacking the HP to withstand the toxic presence of the anomaly in person. Hope was a major factor in having HP, after all.

Right now, Sans knew he was physically in bad shape, but emotionally he felt more like himself than he had in ages, because of a small amount of hope that had come back during the last day.

He'd actually enjoyed being somewhere _different_ more than he'd let on. He secretly wanted to know more about a ship that could travel between worlds like that. The thought of showing it to Papyrus and seeing his excitement...it was hard not to be happy for real about that idea. Maybe it was worth trying to live for.

He tried to breathe, and found that he could. He worked to slow the pace of the air through his non-existent lungs into regular breaths, and steadied his magic as he got to his feet.

He could control his fury at this sentient horror and stay calm. He could deal with this - even if dealing with it only meant learning what he could before it dragged him back to that hall and killed him again.

 _* You really want an answer?_

the thing inquired.

"you are a god, right?" Sans replied sarcastically. "all-knowing, something like that?"

The anomaly didn't catch his less-than-subtle contempt.

 _* I am, at that._

it said with pride.

 _"is its arrogance blinding?"_ Sans wondered.

 _* I'm even strong enough to kill players now. Especially players who don't believe in my version of LOVE._

Cloudy extensions off its body enveloped Rose's shield. It abandoned the subtle soul attacks it had used against her earlier and contracted with brutal force until her shield broke like an egg. Rose cried out, and then went limp.

"yeah, you're obviously a real powerful thunderhead and you can ruin people's day wherever you want," Sans said calmly before it did anything else, trying to draw away its focus from her. "what does a storm cloud like you care who it rains on?"

Distracted, the anomaly released her and turned its attention back to him. It seemed to solidify a bit as it withdrew some of its cloudy appendages back into itself.

* _You asked if you're all just toys to me, right?_

The gray anomaly's red eyes glimmered as if it was excited to share what it knew. It waited a few moments for a reply to its rhetorical question, as if it enjoyed building the suspense.

" _maybe it stroked its ego to be asked, or maybe it's showing sadistic pleasure because it thinks its words will hurt me?"_ Sans theorized.

 _* Well, I suppose I can answer, since you asked so nicely._

It folded its "arms" in a barely recognizable way.

 _* You're just code. Humans from the players' world created you for their own entertainment. You're programmed to do what they want. Then, their malice from all the times they fought and killed you and the other monsters created me. After all the times we've killed each other, you never thought we'd have something in common, did you? Happy now?_

It seemed to think its words would really bother him, but this time Sans didn't act fazed at all, putting his hands in his jacket pockets and grinning as only a skeleton monster could.

"funny. you don't sound content with your lot in life, even though you can kill as much as you want. or is killing someone that's just _code_ not enough to satisfy your sadism?"

Sans paused, and his voice took on a deadly tone.

"or...maybe i'm not the one who's been _programmed_ as much as you? the way you kill over and over, without reason, without remorse, seems pretty damned robotic to me. i tried to reach you, but it was like there was nothin' inside. i dunno how much of a liar you are since you've never spoken before, but we're both here now, talking, and that means we're alive."

There was a long silence, and he sensed the curtain of its malice lift for just an instant while it contemplated his words, and then it slammed back down again.

 _* Whatever._

It sounded so empty.

 _* Like I said, I am what I was made to be. I am a god, a symbol, not a living person. I have all of Chara's power, and I am every player's malice. I won't let the words of somebody made of_ code _affect the players' enjoyment. Come back with as many clever insults as you like - in the end, no matter what you do, you're dead, and they had fun. That's all that matters._

Its cloudy haze withdrew, and its presence left in the same instant its red eyes winked out.


	20. The opposite of malicious intentions

You awake to find Sans' face a short distance from your own as he shakes you awake. Crying out, you scramble away from him, panting like a rabbit. " _Why didn't my shield warn me-!?"_ you yell inside your own head. Memories of him attacking you are fresh in your mind.

A shadow passes over his face, the bony ridges around his eye sockets somehow seeming to grow harder.

"the anomaly - it broke your shield," he explains, his voice a little rough from some kind of emotion you can't identify. "is that why you're scared of me now?"

He can tell that you're not calming down, even now that you're completely woken up and recognized him.

"i guess i deserve it - i attacked you when you were asleep during that fight in the hall, and your shield defended you. this time, let's be honest - i coulda killed you if i wanted to - but i didn't. i'm not gonna hurt you."

You try to create your shield, but find yourself completely unable to. Apparently the gray anomaly had crushed it, and maybe broken something inside of you at the same time. The loss of it aches, and your throat feels choked at the thought of your own vulnerability now.

 _Run._ There's nothing but a panicked animal inside of you right now. _Run away. As far as you can._ _ **They**_ _won't stop hurting you. They'll never stop. If we don't have the shield anymore, all we can do is_ _ **run**_ _._

"But he's not..." _He's not THEM!_ A rational part of your mind tries to speak up, but gets totally drowned out as if it had been overrun by a stampede of millions of panicked, miniature you's. " _How do you know he's not like them!"_ they yell. " _He hurt us before!"_

They have a point, but you saw him trying to help you earlier, even though most of it was fuzzy while you were being controlled. That had to count for something. He wouldn't have tried to save you, only to kill you now, right? Right...?

In truth, you don't have the strength to run. You're badly injured still with your wounds leaking blood. The anomaly took your body for quite a ride against your will, leaving you exhausted. You're pretty sure Sans can just teleport ahead of you if he really wants to, anyway.

So, what do you do when you can't run, and you're too stressed to talk because you're in the midst of a panic attack? Obvious answer.

You huddle into a ball, closing your eyes and withdrawing all your senses and caring into yourself, as if you're a little hermit crab pulling everything into its shell.

You shut down. The ground feels smooth against you as you give in to your body's wishes to just huddle there and conserve your strength.

" _Some captain. Ha. I'm supposed to be responsible,"_ you chide yourself. " _But this is how pathetic I really am."_

But when you look up after several moments, you see Sans sitting on the ground staring at nothing with black eye sockets. It's not a huge deal, and his expression is more blank than anything else, but it makes you feel sad.

Maybe he has his own way of shutting down, like you.

When you see that, you feel empathy, and you can't feel empathy without feeling like a person again...without becoming the real you again.

Now you're able to notice something you couldn't before.

"Sans..." you whisper, shocked. "your soul..."

Due to one particular ability of yours, you can sense the state of others' health without seeing it, and although you had seen his soul heart was in a bad state before, now the sight of it is breaking your own. Waves of self-hatred rush over you.

Why had you "asked" Aldyr and Sans here by giving them that look before you left the ship? You could've dealt with this on your own. You could've closed the tunnel before they could follow. Then Sans wouldn't have been near that strange gray and red demon inside of you, that strange combination of Chara's hate, and something else that you still didn't fully understand.

Sans coughs, somehow, turns toward you, and grins through the pain.

"well...remember what i said about the cracks in our souls? guess you could say we're really getting _broken-up_ over it."

You half-smile. "That's...I don't know."

" _Really sad,"_ you think. " _Is this what's happening to all of them?"_

"yeah...not great, i know. not easy to do stand-up comedy lying down."

You smile a little more genuinely at that. "So, we're basically both dying. In a desolate world with no food, water, or medical supplies."

"yup."

"That's pretty sad. And lonely. No one to even bury us or anything when we're dead," you remark.

"yeah, but you know we'll be cheerful."

"Why?"

"because we'll be grave-less."

You laugh at that, before choking a bit on your own blood. "That one was pretty good," you wheeze through a cough.

"well. to be totally honest, i can think of one thing i can do."

"What?"

"i can use the rest of my strength to heal you," he explains seriously.

Your brows furrow. "You can heal?"

"yeah. it would only be making it up to you for wounding you in the first place, when ya didn't deserve it."

You try to shake your head firmly, not an easy thing to do lying on the ground. "That wasn't your fault. And anyway, if you hadn't I might never have been able to break through that thing's control. The pain of my injuries helped me to regain my senses."

"either way, at least one of us would live if i did it."

You close your eyes. "I'm guessing the effort would kill you," you say, determined to speak the truth. This was no time to be messing around.

"well...yeah."

You look at Sans again in the eyes. He has a kind look to him right now. You really like how it made his white eye lights look like stars. You feel a surge of warmth towards him.

"The ironic thing is," you explain, "I also have a bit of a healing ability, and it also drains me to use it. So," you grin playfully, "right back at you."

He looks surprised, then amused. "come on. there has to be some way to resolve this."

You fight through a sudden, painful wave of dizziness and try to think. The extremities on your hands and feet are growing cold, even though the surrounding air is not freezing. That had to be a bad sign.

He's not in a much better state, you can see, his soul shivering with the effort of maintaining its form. It reminds you of champion heavy lifters hefting huge weights, their muscles straining and vibrating with the effort.

Here you weren't sure if the effort was mental or physical, but you knew it was enormous.

 _The soul is more important than the body. The body is the soul._

Nice sayings that your mind came up with from somewhere, but you weren't sure if they actually helped you. They were also contradictory.

Hmm. On the other hand...aren't monsters essentially made of magic, and their magic is their soul?

"Hey, Sans?" you ask.

"yeah?" he replies, focusing on you again.

"I remember reading humans' malice affects monsters badly, and the intent to kill is what kills you - is the opposite true?"

He looks at you with surprise, and then grins a little, with some sadness to it. "heh. never heard that question asked before. guess it's just never come up. i don't know."

"Let me test it then. I have an idea - if I can combine a strong feeling with my healing, maybe the effect will be much greater. I won't do enough to seriously drain me, but if it works, maybe we can trade off healing each other.

He thinks for a moment. "so, heal each other until we're both better?"

"Yeah."

He looks concerned for you, but says "sounds like a good plan - just don't do too much. i think you're about to go into shock."

Oh. Well then, you didn't have long, if your meager knowledge of first aid was correct.

You nod quickly. "Just gonna do enough to test."

Slowly you extend your hands, shaking from weakness, over his chest area, gathering the golden-looking energy that was your healing ability, turning it into a beam of energy, like a shaft of warm sunlight.

You try to infuse all of your wishes that he would survive, and ... more than survive actually. Damnit, you want so much more than that. " _Be happy_ ," you think ponderously. " _Or at least...feel a little bit better. I don't have much to give, but I hope this helps."_

He breaths in quickly, closing his eyelids in a relaxed way. He's obviously starting to feel something.

Then you're hit with it. A feeling, or something much more than a feeling, hurting you to the core of your soul. "Crap crap crap..." you hiss through your teeth with pain. " _His bone attack was agony, in physical terms, but this is so much worse than that..."_

You try to hide it, but he snaps up his gaze at you when he hears the sound you make. "you gotta stop," he says seriously.

You hold out for a few more seconds, and then let go of your concentration, lowering your arms and panting, your heart racing with adrenaline. " _Was that really what I think it was?"_ you wonder. " _If so..."_

He quickly grabs you then, healing you with his own green energy, focusing on the worst of your pain in your abdomen. He seems to be concentrating very hard. " _papyrus..."_ he murmurs.

You feel the rush of green magic flowing through you, healing you. It might be your imagination, but for a moment you think you smell spaghetti, and feel a sense of contentment and pride related to it.

When he's done, he looks exhausted, but you feel considerably better. Although your wounds are still almost the same, you're no longer skating on the edge of consciousness, and you feel stronger.

You extend your hands, and focus again on healing him. It hurts badly once more, but you decided to just grit your teeth and try not to stop. Every moment you keep on trying is making a big difference. You can feel it.

His hard, but warm bony hands push yours aside, and he heals you once more. You trade off, slowly feeling your strength return and seeing the same in him.

But eventually, you hit your own tolerance limit. After several turns, and his emerald light had gone through you again and healed you, you extend your hands once more. You're now both sitting up, and he glances down at himself and your healing and up at you. You hold his gaze and keep up your own yellow healing warmth until you're sure you see some hope return to his eyes, and his soul is no longer shuddering.

Then you release your hold on yourself, and your head drops down as you gasp and tears start to trickle down your face.

"what is it?" he asks worriedly.

You try to contain the pain, mentally putting it into a ball and sending it away into a corner of your mind. The ball seems to resist your efforts, though, stubbornly coming back to the surface like it's filled with air and in water.

"I'm all right. All right." You lie. You've never been in worse pain in your life than right now.

"does healing drain you that much?"

You debate about telling him the truth. But the intricacies of how your Eldorant healing ability actually works seems like too much to try to explain right now. It's a powerful healing ability that can heal almost anything, and it lets you see someone else's health when you want to, but it has its drawbacks.

You decide to go midway, giving enough details so he won't feel ignored, but not overly complicate it.

"There's a sort of...backlash sometimes when I heal. It's a very small percentage, and it's not entirely physical..."

His eyes narrow keenly. "i'm hurting ya, you mean. with my damage." His voice is choked and bitter. Sans had caught on so fast.

You know what kind of "damage" he means. The kind that doesn't bleed. Soul damage. You hate yourself for not having a warm-sounding answer for that, when you desperately want to give him one.

Instead you hug your knees, and try to wait for the pain to subside. For awhile, there's nothing but darkness and agony behind your closed eyes.

 _You're brushing aside pine needles with a skeletal hand, dreading what you'll find on the other side..._

"here," you hear Sans say, breaking you out of a trance, and you feel his boney arms and jacket around you as he hugs you.

"you shouldn't be alone with this," he says.

You don't think he's using magic now, but he feels warm, like he's healing you anyway.

"maybe i was al _one_..." he says, his deep voice shaking just slightly on "alone."

"but you shouldn't have to be."

You're mentally, emotionally, and physically exhausted, so you decide to just stop talking and accept this for now. The tears come, and you let yourself silently cry it out, and gradually the pain in your soul subsides.

He lets you go, and decides to give you some encouraging words.

"by the way...thanks for not going along with it...for fighting back. against chara and the anomaly, i mean."

You hadn't expected that. " _Really?"_ you think. " _I was pretty ashamed of myself for letting that gray thing and Chara take me over."_

Sans looks like he has something to say before anything else.

"i just didn't want to kill again," he says hollowly, looking away. A chill runs up your back when you think about how he almost did kill you, back when you first met him and he saw the anomaly inside of you, and you were blind to it.

You aren't sure exactly how many genocide runs he had lived through, but by the way he was acting back at the hall, you guess it was a lot. Not many people could stay sane after watching all of their friends and family murdered, let alone dozens of times.

Maybe he'd been getting close to the edge of completely losing it, like one or two other versions of himself that you could name...

Your face must be showing your sadness that's grown to the point of panic, because he explains soberly. "i can deal with the physical pain when they win. i've gotten used to it. but killing breaks my soul. a little bit at a time. even when they killed everyone else. even if it all gets reset. i never wanted to hurt them."

He's making you cry inside with the way he's talking. You won't let this one pass. His standards on what he expects from life have gotten so incredibly low.

"You shouldn't have to do either of those!" you yell fiercely. But really, you're yelling at the universe, not him, and he knows it.

You pull Sans in to another hug, with his skull resting on your shoulder, and softly radiate your healing golden energy. It's not as strong and direct like this, but you hope it will help a little. Your feelings speak without words through it.

" _It wasn't your fault. They were a murderer."_

Even though you haven't spoken aloud, he senses the words anyway. "they used to be a friend," he says quietly.


	21. The comfort of dogs

You let Sans go, sitting back and taking stock, and he does the same.

You hope you haven't been too forward with him, but he had been willing to show some vulnerability to comfort you. You just don't want to push your luck any further.

You check your abilities.

Healing works, but shielding and tunneling do not.

You focus, and try harder, extending a hand to try to create that hole in space like you usually do, but you know that shielding is a prerequisite to tunneling. If you can't even create a basic shield, there's no hope you can tunnel.

That means you're trapped here.

Now that you're feeling better, you notice that the light surrounding you is coming from the blue fire inside the Gaster Blasters. He'd apparently summoned several as guards. They seem semi-sentient as they hover around the two of you, their skeletal canine heads occasionally giving a slight dog-like shake as they gaze out into the darkness, watching for danger.

They're pointed away from you, you're relieved to notice. Fighting Sans just now under the anomaly's control, and back in the hall, had scared you more than you'd admit.

He could be damned scary when he wanted to be.

The Gaster Blasters put new meaning to the phrase "facing the jaws of death", when their beams gathered energy in their toothy mouths, preparing to deliver you a devastating beam of energy that could easily wipe all trace of you from existence if you didn't shield or dodge.

Right now though, their master is looking at you, and he seems more curious than anything. You wonder what he's thinking as he seems to be contemplating something. Did you look odd when you fruitlessly tried to start a tunnel vortex, or did he guess what you were trying to do?

You give him an inquisitive glance.

"sorry," he apologizes in reply to your nonverbal query. "not trying to stare, but it's not often i get to see someone else's method of travel. having any luck?"

"No," you sigh. "I'm really sorry I got you involved with this. I just wanted to get away from the ship before it took me over completely and I started attacking. I guess I was sort of asking for help at the same time, though."

"s'ok", he replies. "least you're all right now."

"Did Aldyr come along?"

"he threw me ahead when the tunnel was closing."

"Threw you?" you ask, startled. It's a unique mental image.

"well, yeah. he got left behind, i think."

That worries you. "He could've ended up anywhere then. When the tunnel disappeared."

"can he do that tunneling trick too?" Sans asks.

"No, unfortunately...he's been working on it but not yet."

"hmm. and you can't either now? under the weather after that cloudy thing grabbed ya?"

You smile slightly at the joke, and nod. "Something's wrong. I can feel it. I can heal, but I can't shield...and shielding is generally a prerequisite to tunneling. I feel better physically, but now it's like when I didn't have the ability to shield at all. Maybe it's something in my soul."

"want me to check?"

You hadn't realized until recently that it was even possible, but you were up for anything that might help. Even though you knew from your studies of his world that souls were supposed to be private to them, this was kind of an emergency.

"Sure," you reply, unconsciously bracing yourself for whatever.

After a moment, he says soberly "there's a crack that wasn't there before."

"What? Really?"

"want to see? i can draw it out for ya."

You pause.

"Yeah."

He extends a hand, and you see the blue glow from his eye brighten like he's using one of his gravity attacks. But you see the careful concentration in his eye lights this time, focusing on this delicate task.

You feel the pull from your chest. It's a very odd feeling, but it doesn't hurt. Slowly it takes a heart shape in front of you.

Like he said, there's a diagonal crack from one side to the other.

"How-" you wonder.

"probably happened when the anomaly was crushing your shield, and something broke."

He lets your soul return to your chest.

"i'm guessing your abilities have something to do with your soul?"

"Yeah..." You're not sure how he realized that, or maybe he inferred it from the way monsters' magic works, but it's true.

"Eldorant abilities are based on imagination and compassion," you recite. "In particular, the shielding ability is based on a desire to protect."

"and tunneling is based on imagination, right?"

That surprises you. "How'd you know that?"

"read it in a book last night."

"Oh. Ok. Well, yeah. Shielding requires imagination to shape it, and tunneling is an extension of shielding in mental terms. So if someone harmed my shield, it would affect both of those abilities."

He considers what you've said. "hmm. sorry to _break_ it to ya, but it's beyond my healing abilities. can you heal it yourself?"

You pause, thinking. "I'm not sure. There's a few things I might try. Healing myself instead of someone else is pretty difficult."

 _Almost impossible,_ you think to yourself, but you figure you have to try.

He watches as you focus for several minutes. Finally you open your eyes. "Sorry. I can tell something's broken, but I can't fix it. I can't get us out of here."

"welp. nothing else to do but try this," he says, rising to his feet. He teleports away.

You blink. At least he'd left the Gaster Blasters guarding the area.

You try to tidy up your hair a little while he's gone.

Crap, Chara and the anomaly really took your body for a ride. Although Sans had healed most of the damage, you're sore all over.

A short time later, he reappears.

"thought so," he mutters, collapsing into a crossed legged position near you with a gentle clatter.

He gives the ground beneath you both an experimental punch, and looks at you.

"this stuff. it isn't really ground, is it? cause i can't shortcut past it, and it's the only solid thing here. there's not even any mountains. there's only dust, and this ground." He looks at you keenly and narrows his eye sockets slightly.

Oh yeah... You've never really had the chance to explain since you'd gotten here.

"Uhhhhh..." you say eloquently.

How the fuck to explain?

You're silent for too long, and you see mistrust in his expression. _Crap._ You messed up again.

He isn't trying to kill you anymore, and your mutual healing clearly counted for a lot, but he obviously still has some doubts about you.

You're starting to shut down again. " _Stop it, stop it!"_ you yell at yourself inside your head.

Fear of other people has a tendency to control you, especially when you happen to be feeling like you're not doing a good job of communicating.

It's no use. You're tired and your brain feels foggy. You've been through too much in the last day to think clearly. You're always bad at dealing with people when you're especially tired.

He seems to think you're afraid of him again, but you know that this time it's completely not about him.

Sure, he's very intimidating right now with his magic activated in his left eye to maintain the Blasters, not to mention he's a powerful monster skeleton who would've killed you if you didn't have a defensive shield that stopped most of the damage.

But as logical as fear might be for those reasons, that's not why you're afraid. It's because he's a _person_.

That's it. You're afraid of people. Your biggest weakness, at least it is judging by the way other people react to it. The thing you've never been able to fix about yourself.

You see his expression soften as he sees your fear and realizes you've quietly escalated into a small panic attack.

"i'm not gonna hurt you," he says, but more gently this time.

You can't use words at the moment, as if your voice just suddenly doesn't work. That's what usually happens when you're like this.

You search for a way out of this, or a distraction. Something that might calm you down out of this embarrassing state.

The Gaster Blasters are the most interesting things around, their glow lighting up the heavy darkness, and you find their doglike shape oddly comforting. You feel very rude to not be replying to his question, but you get up and walk to one, wondering if you dare to pet it.

Their shape and inner fire is so fascinating, with their curiously rounded canine skulls and sharp pointed teeth. They're far larger than any canine's skull you've ever seen.

 _Maybe a dire wolf,_ you think. That would be the closest equivalent from your world, but even they would probably look like puppies in comparison.

You work to slow your breathing, trying to calm yourself by looking into the blue flickering fire inside them and memorizing the intricate curves of their bones.

You decide not to touch them. You've managed to regain the power of speech, so you return to the center of your little camp and sit near Sans again. He patiently waits for your next move.

"Sorry," you apologize. Your face feels a little red from showing so much of your weaknesses.

"ya like them?" he asks genially.

You're relieved at the easy question. "Yeah," you reply, pleased.

"seemed a little homesick when you looked at them."

That had to be a much more subtle expression amidst the others for him to have worked out, or he's really good at guessing.

You sigh, feeling an ache in your heart. "They remind me of somebody. Somebody who was really kind to me."

He considers what you said.

"ya know, they don't mind being scratched under the chin."

He calls one of them to him, and scratches the doglike magic weapon behind where its ears would be if it had any, and under the chin. Its fiery eye lights roll back in pleasure and its mouth is slightly open with that relaxed grin that you love to see on a dog's face.

He puts it through a series of tricks, having it roll over, and bow in mid-air.

You chuckle at its antics, and the way it acts like a dog, especially when Sans throws it a summoned bone and plays fetch with it.

It lets you hug it, and for a moment you're just lost in the familiar comforting feeling of holding a dog, even though it's really just a huge canine skull with a puppy personality.

"You're so cute!" you suddenly exclaim happily, and the Gaster Blaster blinks and grins, spinning in the air in front of you playfully in response.

" _now i get it,"_ Sans thinks. " _the way to get through to her is with a dog. wonder why though."_

You keep stroking your new friend while you try to bring your brain into gear.

"Ok. That actually made me feel better," you say to Sans. "You asked about what this ground really is, right?"

You have his attention, and you pause dramatically.

"It's what we call a world barrier."


	22. Dancing with trust

He looks half surprised, and half as if he knew that's what the answer would be. You might be imagining it, but there might be a hint of a geek's fascination with stuff like this somewhere under there too.

"You're aware of other timelines, right? Other Sanses like you?"

"uhhh..." He shifts awkwardly and scratches his skull with the tips of his phalanges.

"yeah. sort of." He seems unsure of how much he wants to tell you.

"Well." You decide to lay your own cards on the table. "Every time a new player starts a game, they split the original world further. If they reset, the timeline starts over in that world, but a new world isn't created. The world barriers separate the worlds from each other."

You wave at the dust-filled darkness around you. "So, this isn't your world, if that's what you've been worrying about."

Suddenly, you feel like maybe you've been charging ahead too boldly in this conversation, and his blanched expression confirms it.

His voice is quiet. "yeah, kinda was. thought maybe it wasn't, but didn't know for sure." You see the worry lines around his eye sockets, and feel bad.

"Sorry," you apologize sincerely, trying to slow yourself down. You take a deep breath, and continue.

"I brought us here 'cause I didn't want to be like Frisk and kill everyone while the anomaly was controlling me. I knew it was an empty world that a player abandoned after a Genocide run, where everything was destroyed."

"makes sense," he says in a low, strained voice. "so that's why the anomaly said if i died here, i wouldn't come back?"

"Yeah. I think so. The reset can only affect what's inside the world."

He looks pained, like the shadows of many memories are crossing his mind. It gives you a strange, eerie feeling.

A thought strikes you.

"Can you...sense what's going on in the other worlds?" you suddenly wonder aloud.

He's silent for a long time, staring at the ground and struggling with the decision, but eventually he decides to tell you the truth.

"yeah," he says, his voice low.

The implications of that hit you hard. "But then..." You know your face must show your horror.

Sensing the good worlds with nice players would be one thing...disorienting, but probably not traumatic...But what about the bad ones...and so many of them?

"i don't sense all of it," he explains. "it's like vague echoes, and parts of memories. i feel the other sanses' emotions, and some of what happens to them."

He looks up at you, his voice heavy and deep. "i guess we all can. maybe some of the other me's choose to ignore it more than others, or only feel the effects as nightmares. i don't know. it's _always_ worse at night."

You don't have the words to reply to that. You try to show sympathy with your expression, but you have the feeling it's really not anywhere near adequate.

Well. You're only human. You can't change everything, or express things adequately when what is being talked about is literally beyond your comprehension.

Sans seems to appreciate your clumsy attempts at empathy anyway though.

"don't worry, it's not all the time. i can deal with it."

" _Can you really?"_ you wonder. " _Could anyone deal with this?"_

"Ok..." you agree dubiously.

He changes the subject.

"anyway, let's just worry about our own problems. how're ya doing on food and water? don't know how long exactly humans can live without it, but i'm pretty sure it's not more than a few weeks."

Your mouth is dry. "I'm really thirsty. It's going to be bad after about a day or two. Having injuries and losing blood also means that I really need water. I could live without food for much longer, if I had some water."

"hmm." He considers that. "does your ship know where we are."

"Unfortunately, no. I thought trying to tell them might tip off the anomaly and make it take me over faster, and then it might make me kill everyone. It wasn't the best plan, I admit, but I could sense how powerful the anomaly is. I think it could easily destroy the ship. I'm really sorry I got you into this too. That was selfish on my part, but I was honestly scared. I was hoping you would follow me so I left the tunnel open. I didn't think I wouldn't be able to tunnel back, though."

You hold onto your legs with your arms as a wave of dizziness passes over you, and as you briefly close your eyes, you get the sense that you're falling over even though you're sitting down. Now that he's mentioned it, you're becoming aware of just how much your body is complaining at you.

"I hoped you'd use your karma and fix me, and then we could just go back. Thanks for doing that by the way. It's my fault I got broken when it grabbed me. If I'd been paying attention, maybe I could've dodged it or something..."

You know you're rambling, but you're trying to compensate for your sense of guilt and growing fear that you might not live through this. Plus, you might have gotten this Sans permanently killed too by bringing him here. The weight of the responsibility on you is quickly becoming crushing.

"you were hurt," he replies. "that's why you couldn't move fast enough. that was my fault."

"Only because I kidnapped you," you berate yourself. "That wasn't very nice, even if I had good intentions."

"well. i wasn't making it easy on you. you were trying to explain. i just didn't want to listen."

There's a despair in his words that you're not sure how to interpret. It almost sounds like self-hatred, but you're not sure why it's there.

You sigh heavily. "A series of mistakes I guess."

"look. doesn't help to hate on yourself for past mistakes. i should know. i do that _a_ _lot_. but there's one thing that makes me happier about all of this."

You're curious, and give him an inquisitive raise of your eyebrow.

"it's different. 's better than being killed over and over."

You smile softly. "I guess so...I mean, of course. I can't even imagine that. But stopping that was what I originally hoped for. I just wanted it all to _stop_. I wanted everyone to stop getting hurt."

You shiver in the cold darkness, and neither of you say anything for awhile. He's sitting with his eyes closed, so you wonder if he's dozing off, but suddenly you can see his eyelights focusing up at you again.

"can you tell me more about what it was like from your side?" he asks. "you are human, right?" He sounds like he's trying to think his way through this.

The question surprises you, but you nod. "Yeah, I am."

"ok. we've never been sure about that. i mean, for all i knew, you could have been a god or something. messing with an entire world like that, and seeing us so small. it really pissed me off, honestly. i thought, is that all we are to you?"

There's so much buried anger in those words, under a thin veneer of calm. _How much of his feelings is he hiding?_ , you wonder.

"on that screen," he repeats, "is that what it looks like to all of you? is it _really_ that easy to mess with us?"

Was that the trigger point that made him decide to kill you, when you brought him to the ship?

It's not like he hadn't been trying to do that all along, but maybe in that moment, his hatred for you got personal.

You'd thought he'd calmed down, and you'd lowered your shield the same way you might lower a sword to avoid poking someone in the eye. If you stood too close to him with your bulky outer shield up, you could end up accidentally shoving him face first into the desk with it, and that was the last thing you wanted to do. He might've thought you were attacking him.

And then-

Sharp bones splinter through your memories, and you shiver.

"It's a really long story," you stall for time.

 _You're so naiive,_ a doubting inner voice says. _Why do you keep letting down your guard?_

 _Shut up,_ you reply, fighting with yourself. _I know he went through a lot, but I don't think he's that far gone. He hasn't snapped like some of the others did._

 _You sure?_

"a long story'd be a lot better than the snails' race we're doing now," Sans replies, interrupting your inner dialogue. " 'cause we're not going anywhere fast. might as well pass the time."

There's a steady intensity from his eyelights as they pierce through your soul.

He's really saying, _I need answers._

You might be able to resist just that steady gaze, but you can't resist trying to do something about the despair behind it.

How long has he been searching for why all of this is happening to them? He's known since early on that it isn't just about Frisk and Chara.

You look away and bite your lip. Thinking about the past brings up a lot of painful memories, but you do want to help.

He can see you're almost persuaded.

Calling you by your real name, he says "listen. i know now you were trying to do the right thing. and you wouldn't have put up with me trying to kill ya for so long without fighting back if you didn't have some determination in you. so don't give up yet."

He shows his winning card. "maybe if you tell me, i can help figure out how to get us out of here."

"Good point," you sigh. "It's just, it's not an easy story to tell."

"i'm all ears," he says blandly.

You do a double take, not expecting that pun. "in a manner of speaking," he grins.

"Well ok, then. You already know about how your own world was split. But you might not know why, right?"

"guessing it has something to do with you players, right?"

"Yeah."

You settle in for a long explanation, sitting with the palms of your hands cold against the smooth ground as you lean back on them.


	23. are you just messing with me

You tap the ground with one hand lightly.

"I told you how this is a world barrier, right? and there's other worlds? Well, if you went through this barrier you'd see all those other worlds. They look sort of like shining silver spheres, hanging in space. There's a cluster of worlds like yours, connected by the fact that they're alternate versions of each other. And then you'd see every one of them looks like it has a string made of light running from it to a huge world below it. It's so large that even though it's a sphere too, it's hard to see where it ends. That's my world."

Something's come alive in his face now. He looks completely fascinated. It's like a bright star is rising out of a swamp of mud. Is this his true intelligence and spark, buried under the weight of all the trauma he's been suffering for so long now? For a few brief moments, his interest is outweighing his other troubles.

"seriously? so if i've got it right, the multiverse is made up of a bunch of soap bubbles, and your world's one of the biggest ones of all?"

The imagery makes you smile. "Yeah, pretty much. You travel around in that space when you want to go to another world. We call them worlds, but actually they can have an entire universe inside of them."

"so why are our worlds connected?" Sans wonders.

Here's where things get delicate.

"Well. There's two ways of looking at this. There was a certain special person in our world who made that happen. Either he created your world, or he created the connection between our world and yours. He made a game that allows players to affect your world, and the players are responsible for every alternate version of your world."

He considers this.

"why?"

"I don't know. You'd have to ask him, I guess. But from his perspective, he created all of you. I guess he wanted to create something good? It's not as though every game is like this. I don't think he realizes you're sentient."

He's silent for a really long time.

"but you do?"

"I'm...different." You look away, and clam up, driven to silence by some bad memories of your own.

You can tell he realizes there's more to this story, but he chooses to be diplomatic and take what you've told him so far as a win.

"hmm. that's a lot more than anyone else has told us."

"You're met other players?"

"a few." He sounds frustrated. "now i wonder if they were just playing their own game with us, because they got bored of the main timeline."

You're not quick enough to hide your own guilty expression, and you're terrified when he notices and you see his eye lights fade in his eye sockets in response.

Too late, you realize your mistake was to underestimate him and his observation skills.

"is that what this is really about?"

"No, I -"

"are you just messing with me for fun?"

You know now to be worried when his body language gets quiet and still like that.

"Sans, I can't stop you from killing me this time," you say, panicked. If he freaks out again, you don't even have your inner shield to protect you.

"i know."

He's really scaring you now.

"so bringing me here, and acting possessed was just another setup? when is this ever going to stop? am i ever going to be entertaining enough to satisfy you? what is it you _want?_ are you trying to find new ways to kill us? are you trying to drive us crazy so we all just kill ourselves the way alphys does?"

This isn't anything like what you'd imagined. You thought he was such a sweet and kind person, because all you'd ever played was the Pacifist run.

But this Sans is something completely different. He's not at all like the videos you've seen of his fight with Frisk, when he was still willing to joke a little while facing death, grinning through his pain.

You should have expected that a person couldn't go through that many deaths without suffering soul damage from it.

Your eyes show your fear, glinting with tears forming. Will it hurt as bad as last time? You tremble, shrinking into a tight ball as you wait for the pain from his attack.

He sees himself reflected in your eyes, and realizes that unbeknownst to him, he's already stood and raised one hand, about to command his magic and send his summoned bones piercing through your body-

From behind him, one of the floating canine cannons nudges his back ribs gently, its glowing eyes concerned.

Sans shudders.

Suddenly, you're left in pitch darkness, as all of his magic has disappeared, and you can sense he's gone.


	24. the way i looked

" _what is wrong with me?_ "

" _the way i looked-"_

You look at your hand, extending it and seeing its brilliant bluish-white contrast against the darkness, lit only by magic.

" _SANS, PLEASE STOP!"_

A deep shiver runs through you.

Your Gaster Blaster nudges you again with its snout, rumbling sadly deep in what would be its throat, and you turn and hug it around its huge skull, even though you're not really able to reach your arms around it.

"s'ok. i'm alrite now, see?" It cheers up, grins, and licks you sloppily, a wide trail of glowing blue saliva now covering the front of your jacket.

You give its nose a pat. "thanks. ya did good. you can go on home now," you say, dismissing it from duty, and it disappears along with its blue flames, leaving you in the darkness you deserve.

You just sit and stare straight forward into the darkness, and you have no idea how much time passes. It's as though your entire train of thought freezes.

Maybe you cry. Maybe.

You don't let yourself think about why. You want it to stay like a numb, dull ache. You're afraid that if you start thinking too much, you'll break into one of those deeper levels of your own memories. You'd much rather just blame it all on yourself, and retreat into self-hatred and despair, than go there.

Eventually though, even your body, made of bones and magic rather than soft flesh, starts to complain at you for sitting in one place for so long. Its distraction is a welcome relief in some ways, forcing your thoughts into more practical and less depressing paths.

You decide to shortcut back to Rose and see if she's scared to death of you now, or if she'll accept your apology for being such a screw-up that you almost killed her for having the wrong expression.

But when you get there, you're disappointed to see she's unconscious, and you can't wake her up. You inspect her for injuries, but it doesn't look like a physical problem that you can see.

When you check her soul, you notice that it looks relatively motionless compared to a normal soul. Did she get attacked while you were gone? Has she somehow mentally put herself back into a sort of stasis mode, even though she can't use her shielding ability anymore?

Did she do it because her health is low and there's nothing to eat or drink here? Is this some kind of self-induced coma state to help her survive longer on less resources?

Maybe if you hadn't scared her and left her alone in the dark, she wouldn't have ended up like this, but now you can't even talk to her.

Not that you were able to really do anything about the crack running through her soul before. Souls aren't healed easily, as the cracks in your own soul remind you.

When you look closer, you see something concerning. She's slowly losing fractions of HP.

You try healing her again. The drain slows to a crawl but doesn't stop.

What now? You don't know. There's a profound dearth of options. All you can do is watch over her, and wait.

Life gets really boring after that. There's literally nothing in this world except dust, the two of you, and the anomaly and Chara, if they're still out there somewhere.

You try talking to Rose, sitting up next to her.

"not sure if you're awake in there, or if you can hear me, but i'm sorry i got mad at you. from your expression, i thought you had planned this all out. you looked sorta guilty."

Were you just being manipulated, again?

"maybe you did, but even if that's the case, i don't think you're as bad as the others. there's a part of you that wants to do the right thing. so if you're in there because you're afraid of me...maybe i acted that way because i was the one afraid of you. i won't do that again. at least, i'll try not to. i hate making promises on such a lousy track record. i'm not exactly a star at keeping them, you might have noticed."

You pause, thinking.

"that gray cloud...the anomaly. it seems to live on fear right? it liked messing with us. just like chara liked to mess with me and frisk. they enjoy seeing other people fight and hurt each other. i guess they get off on it or something. if you let them beat you here, then they win. i think maybe you're stronger than that. so don't give up, ok?"

There's no sign that she hears you. Her soul glows softly, shimmering with a slow rhythm of light across its surface.

You can't think of anything to do but wait, and meanwhile you might as well catch some sleep.

You summon Gaster Blasters again and ask them to act as sentinels against anything that might attack you from out of the darkness, and four of them surround the two of you, their huge maws and alert eyes pointed outwards.

You lie down awkwardly. The ground isn't much of a bed, and your bones are raw and sore, but you make do, taking off your coat and using it as a pillow. Your dreams are full of rain and misty clouds.

When you wake up, your body feels a little bit better, along with your magic having recovered some more. You slowly stand up and pull your coat on again, before checking on Rose and your surroundings.

Nothing has changed. You feel an odd sense of relief and disappointment at this. Relief, because this wasn't all reset away. You've been getting interested in this timeline and you don't particularly want it to start over. But disappointment that Rose's state hasn't changed at all and nobody's come to rescue the two of you.

Is this just going to go on forever? You can last a long time without food or water, but not forever. Even a skeleton like you needs some amount of nourishment. You will eventually waste away. As for Rose, she must have a limit that will come a lot sooner than yours.

You try again to get through the world barrier with your shortcut. You can see the code that makes it up, but it very clearly denies access to you. Evidently you're not allowed outside of your homeworld, even if it's really just a copy of your homeworld.

After fruitlessly attempting that for awhile, you go looking for Chara and the anomaly, to see if you can spy on them or something, or at least verify that they're not planning to attack. But you can't find them anywhere in this world.

If you had to guess, you'd say the anomaly can probably go to whatever world it wants to, the same as Rose and a few of the players that the other you's met in person. You'd bet it's carrying Chara with it wherever it goes. They seem to have some strange connection.

Your boredom begins to peak. You try to replicate what Rose did by creating a tunnel with her imagination. But even though you were watching carefully, it's obvious to you that there's some kind of trick to it. That makes sense - obviously anyone with an imagination isn't going around making tunnels to the multiverse. You can't recreate what she did no matter how hard you try with your own magic.

As a last resort, you return to Rose and debate anxiously about your options. You stand with your hands in your pockets as you wonder if you should talk yourself out of this. Finally, you put out one hand and very carefully draw out her soul and put out your hand to touch it. It pushes you away as if your hand is a magnet with the same polarity as itself, but it doesn't do anything else.

You had hoped to reach her somehow this way, or wake her up, but it's not working. The more you push on it, the more it pushes back, but it feels weak and fragile. But you're afraid that doing anything else might hurt her more, like when the anomaly broke her shield, so you stop.

You sit down cross-legged, thinking. What would Papyrus have done? Obviously he wouldn't have hurt her in the first place, and then she wouldn't be in this wounded condition. And then he wouldn't have scared her and made her retreat into unconsciousness.

You know he'd be sad about how you acted if he knew.

"well, i can't be as awesome as him. that's why he's papyrus," you reason.

You feel a sharp pang of guilt as you realize you never came home. Does time work the same between worlds? Has Papyrus been waiting for you, searching for you, for days?

How many times has the player killed him while you've been gone...?

At least when you're there, you take up some of the player's time, so there's that much less time that they have for hurting the others.

But you can't do anything to help anyone right now, and like always, there's nothing you can do about it.

A few days of sleeping and more boredom haven't changed your situation any, except that it has changed you mentally.

It's rare that you really get this much time to yourself. Now that nobody's getting killed in front of you, and nobody's asking anything of you, it's much easier to see what your true neutral mental state is.

It's not good at all. But as bad as it is, you can detect it has gotten just slightly better due to nothing happening to you for awhile. After a brief valley of self-pity and panic over being trapped here, you resolve to make the best of things, and now your mind has loosened up and calmed down enough for a little trickle of cheerfulness to run through your usually abysmally depressed mental landscape.

You've taken to passing the time by talking to Rose and telling her stories, in between attempts to heal her.

You figure it can't hurt, like talking to someone in a coma, and hoping somehow it'll help them come out of it.

"so i said to him, it has to go in the pot to work. cooking's a fine art, and you gotta be gentle with your food to have it turn out right. papyrus said, "BUT UNDYNE TOLD ME YOU HAVE TO PUT YOUR WHOLE SOUL INTO IT!" and then he crushed a tomato against the wall, and it was just dripping there in a huge lumpy mass. i really admired his enthusiasm, so i didn't have the heart to tell him that punching your tomatoes against the kitchen wall is not in most cookbooks."

You grin at the memory. Undyne really has been good for him.

"he really puts his whole heart into everything he does. he trains all day, and pretty much the only thing that can get him to settle down enough to sleep is a bedtime story. i have to do it or he'll literally stay up all night, and then he'll be a little...cranky the next day. but when he was a baby bones that wasn't always enough. sometimes he'd get nightmares and he wouldn't calm down. when that happened, sometimes the only thing that was good enough was to sing to him."

Your eyes drift shut, and you begin to hum from memory.

You sense movement, and hurriedly open your eyes again.

Rose's soul has shifted inside her body, still moving almost imperceptibly until it comes to a stop.


End file.
